Ruin Me

11. Help me

The throb of my head was the first thing I felt, then the churning in my stomach and finally a dull ache blossoming on my forehead. I wished I could say this was the worst I'd ever felt but in reality it wasn't even close.

I squeezed my eyes shut in an attempt to go back to sleep in a hope that being unconscious would prevent the ever growing pain in my head. It didn't. I was fully awake now and there would be no going back to my emotionless, unconscious state.

As I pried open a bleary eye I was surprised to find that I was in my own room, in my own bed wearing an oversized t-shirt with absolutely no idea how I got there. My more pressing worry though was who had changed me? The whole situation just made my headache even worse and I felt the room start to tilt and my stomach flip.

I barely made it to the toilet in time before I emptied the remaining contents of my stomach. I was rudely reminded of how my self loathing actions held consequences, a fact I determinedly forgot about after my tenth shot. As I swilled my mouth out with water from the sink and filled my empty stomach with its soothing coolness I tried to remember any part of last night. To my horror I found that the last thing I could clearly remember was walking into the party and after that only odd pieces. Jenny clutching Nico, shots with Jenson and Grey's furious expression, I couldn't remember what for though.

I felt like absolute shit. So I did what I always did when I had to get a hangover out of my system, I went for a run. Mom had taught me to do it. She had a special gift that allowed her to completely bounce back from a night of heavy drinking and turn up the next day looking like she'd spent that night at a spa. I hadn't been blessed with that trait. Instead mom had taught me to go for a run. It was the hardest thing to do but the most effective, I'd found. You felt so terrible while running that the second you stopped the pain lessened, it was a way of making the normal pain seem less because you'd just forced something much worse. Running also woke me up and made me focus on something other than the throbbing in the back of my skull.

I'd done a lot of running since moms death. Hours upon hours of running until it felt like my lungs would explode and legs would snap.

I changed out from the t-shirt I didn't recognise, it looked like a men's one, into yoga pants and a sports bra. I checked the time on my clock, 7am, I prayed that meant no one else would be awake and I could run in peace. Luckily my wish was granted and I managed to make my way out of the building without meeting anyone, the corridors were filled with nothing but empty silence.

Outside the grounds were wet with dew and slightly crisp with cold, a light breeze whipped at the grass and my hair. I liked the cold air though, it woke me up. I started to run to keep myself warm, I followed the brick wall that outlined the perimeter of the school. I guessed it to be a couple of miles long, the perfect distance to run off my hangover.

I'd always loved running, I liked the feeling that I was making progress, I was going somewhere. I could get away from everything even if it was just temporary, I was still free for a while. The sprawling lawns and clear blue sky here made running even more peaceful unlike the smoky, bustling streets of Vegas. A complete calm settled over me.

"Cara," a pair of footsteps rushed to catch up with me from behind and a voice I recognised called my name. I spun on my heel to face them.

"Sawyer," I relaxed as I saw his charming face come into view, "what are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you that," Sawyer slowed from his sprint, he wasn't even panting, "I run here every morning and I've never seen you before."

"You do?" My eyebrows shot up, how could I not have noticed that?