Ruin Me

46. Remember me

"Nico!" I yelled. It was the next morning and I was headed towards breakfast when I saw Nico on his own without the usual entourage of the Silent Boys. He was leaning against the wall with his head tilted to one side and as he turned I could see he was on his phone.

"I already told you, I don't want to go. If the other two aren't why do I have to? He doesn't want me there anyway so why should I? Stop calling me Miguel because I'm not going to change my mind," he hissed down the phone in a furious tone that had clearly been repeated over and over again. With an irritated stab of his finger he hung up on whoever he'd been calling.

"Are you okay?" I asked cautiously as I reached out to touch his forearm delicately. I hated seeing such annoyance on his usual buoyant face.

"Yeah it's nothing," it didn't take a lie detector to tell he was lying through his teeth.

"Who's Miguel?" I remained tentative not wanting to push him too much as he'd clearly been having a private conversation I wasn't meant to be part of.

"My brother," Nico stated keeping his voice bland and expressionless. He tugged his hand through his hair uncomfortably. He wasn't enjoying the focus on his family.

"How many siblings do you have?" I pursued, I wanted to know more about him.

"Miguel's the eldest, then Cristian, then Camilla and I'm the baby of the family," Nico listed formally like he was reciting from a script.

"Wow, I wish I had that many siblings," I sighed longingly. I'd always wanted a big family, I'd watched hundreds of people interacting with their siblings and felt it was something big I was missing out on. I could never join in when people complained about their younger brothers messing up their rooms or older sisters stealing their clothes. I longed for that kind of unconditional relationship with someone near my age yet Nico looked anything but pleased when talking about his family.

"I'll happily give you mine, family isn't all it's cracked up to be," Nico huffed out his nose as we headed towards the Dining Hall our feet echoing on the polished floorboards.

"Why don't you get on?" I knew I was getting very close to a nerve and I had to tread very carefully from now on in case I hit the wrong spot and caused him to completely shut himself off to me.

"We're just very different people," Nico shrugged casually, "just because you're related doesn't mean you'll be anything alike."

"I guess," I nodded noncommittally.

"So did you enjoy the fireworks show last night?" He immediately snatched the opportunity to change the conversation. I was aware of how much he sounded like me in my desire to dodge discussing the life we led beyond these walls.

"They were amazing," I agreed in awe, "I loved them." I met his eyes directly and watched as his smile reached his eyes touching them with a glint of delight.

"I'm glad, I've never done them before," Nico admitted.

"You what?" I yelped.

"I've never done fireworks, it was a bit of an experiment to be honest."

"You'd never done them before and you still did it, do you have any idea how dangerous they are?" I fumed knowing but not caring that I sounded like a scolding mom.