• tyler always woke up before most people. it was his few hours of silence where he could read and listen to music, relax or have a bath, maybe sing a little too.
with his complete lack of sight, his hearing, scent, touch and taste became slightly sharper, as he had nothing else to focus on. he needed them to literally stay alive.
he gets out of bed, running his fingers through his hair. he knew he should probably wash it, but he preferred to bath at night, like an extended relaxation hour.
he gets out of bed, walking into his living room, feeling the carpet on the floor turn to wood, smiling as he had made it once again.
but before he could do anything there was a knock on the door. tyler reaches out, trying to remind himself where in the room he was, then making his way to the door, leaning up against it.
"who is it?" he asks, he wasn't expecting any visitors, he never got any, he didn't really believe that he heard a knock.
"brendon. just thought i'd pop by before going to work."
tyler feels himself going warm, a smile on his face.
"c-can you open up, p-please? i've got something for you."
tyler unlocks the door from muscle memory, pulling it open and stepping back. he can hear brendon's footsteps as he walks in.
"y-you okay, ty?"
the shortest nods, looking down, and scratches the back of his neck.
"yeah. what time is it? why are you here and what are you doing awake?"
brendon chuckles, stepping closer. tyler didn't know what to do.
brendon smelt like his cologne. his breath was minty but his body was a dark musk. it was nice. reminded tyler of anything advertised as masculine. which wasn't a bad thing, he wasn't complaining, tyler loved that.
"five forty something. 'wanted to see your face, that's all."
tyler knew he was blushing, he couldn't see brendon's eyes but he knew he was slightly attracted his smell, the sound of his breath. it was unique.
the sound of his breathing. he could hear him breathing, he was standing so close, and with a tuned ear tyler secretly loved it.
but at the same time he didn't. brendon wasn't just one of his only two fiends, but also tyler couldn't even trust him. tyler didn't even want to face him.
"excuse me." he says under his breath, disappointed at himself, maybe he disappointed brendon too.
he steps away, carefully relying on memory to guide him back to his bedroom, the wood floor back to carpet, over to his bed, and reaches out for his blackout glasses. tyler hadn't seen his eyes in a decade so he didn't know what he was so insecure about, but maybe that's what he was so doubtful about it. he felt sick at the thought of people seeing him without them on, he naturally kept his eyelids open and blinked just like anybody else he knew. he cried and rubbed his eyes- but yet he saw nothing. what if they were ugly? scary? bloodshot? he would never know and never really ever showed anyone he was particularly close to now. and he never asked. he didn't want to know.
he goes back into the living room towards the ground door, trying to guess where brendon had gone.
"i hope you don't mind that i sat on your incredibly comfortable sofa," brendon begins, making tyler jump a little "i've got five minuets. want to chat?"
the small boy raises an eyebrow, and chuckles. "'chat?' really?"
"y-yeah-"
"ok. 'you dating joshua yet?"
the older boy snorts, tyler feeling his legs go wobbly and he leans against the wall trying to act casual. not only did he really like brendon, he was also out of his comfort zone. he'd gotten too used to being alone. he wanted to seem cool and casual.
"tyler, can i ask you a question?" brendon simply states.
"y-yeah?"
"what do your glasses do?"
the small boy raises an eyebrow. "o-oh. lots of things, really. it stops me hitting my sensitive eyes on stuff like sharp corners or tree branches or something. and, l-like when you see someone with sunglasses in the winter or indoors it's a p-pretty good way to signal to someone from afar you're blind."
"oh-"
"-and of course there's other reasons. people who can see tend to make eye contact when talking, but for me that's difficult so i just look even more awkward than i already do, but with these on i don't have to focus much on direction. plus my eyes aren't the best looking. it's embarrassing."
it goes quiet for a moment or too, as brendon thinks about it. "so do they like... help you see anything? at all?"
"no, i'm completely blind. they do for some people. but for me? no. no chance. my loss of the ability to see comes from my brain itself. my visual cortex, the part of our brain that controls seeing- the very back of my brain is damaged on both sides, leaving me completely blind. also then of course i got cataracts so i'm not only blind but my eyes are also ugly."
"i bet they're not."
