Trapped

44

This is it. The first day to the rest of my life. I refuse to think about Shawn. I refuse to acknowledge his existence, I just need to get school over and done with, hope no one brings up anything they saw about me in the papers over the summer, and then go to work when i'm finished.

"No ones talking about you and Shawn, which is good I guess." Leila tells me while we walk to English.

"Yeah, they probably have better things to talk about." I shrug. "Or they forgot, it was in June."

"Hopefully they forgot or don't care." Leila shrugs. "Have you heard from aaron lately?" she asks.

"He text me yesterday saying he would drive me to school then completely ignored me this morning. I had to get a taxi."

"Same with me, last weekend we were meant to go to the movies, he told me he was on his way and just didn't show up? I was stood in the movie theatre like an asshole for an hour." She huffs.

Aaron has been acting weird and distant lately. If i didn't have all this shit going on in my life I'd probably try to find out what the fuck is going on with him but i'm just starting to focus on myself and my own success right now.

"Weird. We'll probably see him today, he wouldn't skip the first day of school." I shrug as we take our seats in class.

"True." She sighs.

Our teacher tells us to analyse some shitty poem in pairs, which is difficult considering there's like seven people in this lesson.

"Hey, El." I hear and i turn my head to find Cleo Mathews leaning into me.

"I saw the papers. No way are you dating a convict? that's so wild." she giggles. Poor private school girls think anything is fucking wild. They're all either so extremely sheltered or so wild because they know their money can get them out of any trouble.

"I'm not dating him."

"Oh... Still the fact that you were just... with him is wild! I mean how did it happen?"

"Cleo, I really don't want to talk about this, and i'd appreciate it if you kept it to yourself." This is the last thing I need right now, everyone in this school talking about me... judging me.

"Of course I won't say anything but everyone already knows I mean, you were on the front cover of every newspaper in the city at the beginning of summer, of course we all saw." She shrugs. fuck sake.

"What was everyone saying?"

"Not much, some people didn't care, a lot of people were shocked but some weren't because... you know, it's you."

I guess out of all the girls in this school I am most likely to date a criminal considering my attitude towards things and the way I act.

"But it was old news by the end of the week. I mean, Stacey Henson is pregnant with her thirty something year old boyfriend, her dad kicked her out the house and everything, and in August Tommy Beckett and his 'crew' got busted for an illegal party, he got arrested for possession of drugs as well. Your news kind of... faded into the back ground."

I'm relieved a little that no one cares... but it does put me on edge knowing everyone knows. I don't want people asking questions.

"So... Stacey Henson pregnant? How did that happen?"

I speak with Cleo all through the lesson and again with her and Leila at lunch. I found out that Stacey met her boyfriend in a bar when she was out with fake ID. Apparently he's a good guy but the age gap is so worrying that her parents never liked it, so of course when she got pregnant at eighteen, they kicked her out. Tommy had some party at his house and someone called the police, there were all sorts of drugs there, but obviously he got let out on bail that his parents paid for. Also, Cameron S was caught stealing cigarettes from a convenience store, and his dad bailed him out and said 'good job'.

I've never been one to indulge in this type of silly teenage gossip. It doesn't interest me at all, but for some reason while Cleo was rambling on I felt... normal. Like an actual teenager, doing actual teenager things. It's been a long time since I felt like this and I feel... good.

"Oh yeah! and you know Aaron Carpenter, apparently he's seeing this girl who lives like two hours away. She's super rich and home schooled. Jack foster used to date her too and told us."

What? Aaron has a girlfriend? and I had no idea????? What the fuck!

"What? do you know how long it's been?"

"No." She shrugs while taking a bite of her sandwich. "She's rich but like... Different, her dad was like a professional snowboarder and her mom is a producer. She goes to like cool parties, she went to the VMA's after party, apparently she's hooked up with loads of celebrities. She used to live in LA but she moved to Canada when she turned 19 and that's when Jack met her, they dated for like two days he said but he definitely slept with her and told us all she's a bit loose so explains why Aaron is with her." Cleo shrugs.

People at school know how close me and Aaron used to be. but recently the just assumed we drifted apart, because we made it seem that way after we slept together so people didn't get suspicious and asking questions. And who would've thought we were so good at pretending not to be friends that even aaron started to believe It. I mean, what an asshole. he's been my friends since I can fucking remember, and he cant tell me when he's in relationship? but continues to pester me about mine? he must be kidding.

"How the fuck did Aaron meet someone like that?"

"No idea." Cleo shrugs.

"She's Nineteen as well... wouldn't she be like mature and stuff." Leila asks.

"I guess, she's super cool though, like I know loads of girls here want to be like her." Cleo says as the bell rings.

"Anyway, see you guys tomorrow." She smiles and waves.

"A girlfriend!?" I scream when Cleo leaves.

"That idiot! That's probably why he ditched me at the movies, what a piece of shit."

"Probably why he ignored my texts about driving me to school too, and missed the first fucking day back." I sigh. He's such an asshole.

"We totally need to confront him. This weekend." Leila says and I nod.

"Definitely."