Trapped

1

Dull. Dull, white, dull grey and dull black are the only colours I see as I walk down these halls. My parents said some 'volunteer work will help me out in the future.' And this is the only place that would accept me.

Toronto west detention centre.

I don't want to be here every day of the week for hours on end, I don't know why I agreed to this. Oh yeah, because I've 'got too much attitude and gaining experience, would help you simmer down and get on the road to a good future.' So my mother put it. First off I don't have attitude I'm just not a push over. And the idea of 'simmering down' sickened me at first, and it still does. I Only agreed to this after realising I can't really be aggressive my whole life and fighting to get what I want. That won't get me a job, to get money to move out. And hell knows I can't live with my parents anymore. They're suffocating. The both of them are prudish and push me to do things I don't want to do. They've written out my future for me but haven't even asked me what I want for myself. It's fucking infuriating, so maybe if I calm down with my so called attitude I could finally get a job this summer and save up to move the hell out of there.

I'm not prepared to stay here with stuck up kids. Well 'kids' half are older than me. I don't know how I feel about spending my time with people like this though. Some are suspects of murder waiting a trial. Murder. I don't know how I feel about being the sort of stuffy teacher to a murderer. Others are small or short time offenders. In here for as long as their sentence because they're too young to be in real prison. Although time in there would probably do them some good.

Kids in here range from boys robbing a convenience store, to actual killers. It's crazy really. I don't know when I think about it, it interests me. I might not have too much of a bad time if the kid I'm put to 'look after' has done something worth me actually listening too. Knowing my luck I'll probably be stuck with someone who broke their neighbours window or something. But hey at least they won't be threatening or intimidating.

"Miss Johnson?" The woman approaches me at my seat just opposite the front desk.

"Yeah, uh hi." I shake the hand she stretches out towards me.

"Welcome to Toronto west detention centre. You'll be assigned to a child, that you will assist and watch over at your time here. We understand you're just here for experience so we won't put you with someone too intimidating." She laughs.

"I don't mind." I shrug. "I'll take what I can get."

"We're still baring in mind you're 17. So we've found you someone close to your age so you don't feel like a baby sitter with someone younger than you. The oldest person we have here is only a year older than you."

I don't know what to say at this point because I really have no interest in this what so ever.

I don't want to be here. I choose to, yes. But it's so it will help me do what I want in the future.

"You'll be here 6 days a week, you can take off time whenever you want, but it may affect your record. All you'll have to do is give the resident, breakfast take him to the main hall for lunch and dinner, and assist him with his daily activities and just watch over him basically." This woman explains and I nod.

"I'm mrs, Stevens but the kids round here call me chloe, we try to keep it hip." She giggles and I want to laugh at the irony right now but my features remain straight.

We continue to walk in silence. I think she feels that if she talks I won't respond which I probably won't.

"Here you go. This is block A. The kids in here are short time offenders either too young to be in prison or there's no point because their crime was too petty for a trial in front of an actual judge."

"So they're like what, the kids that have been put to do community service too many times that it's become a joke." It was more of a statement than a question.

I knew I would get stuck with some boring ass kids.

"Well, a bit. Or their crime was small, or they are only sentenced here for a couple of weeks." She smiles.

We continue to walk down block A until we stop out side a door.

"Cell 332B, this is your cell. His name is Thomas, he's been convicted here for 3 weeks for robbing his stepfathers house, unarmed of course. He's 16 and has a slight case of anxiety."

"Anxiety? Are you sure I should be with this kid I mean my attitude is a little uh... Strong, and full on. I don't want to scare him or give him a panic attack."

Unlike me to think of someone besides myself but I wouldn't be able to help myself and I can't have this kid having a panic attack, bad enough he's in this shit hole, without having an attack, 3 weeks or not.

"If you want we could switch you with out other volunteer that starts today? It would take a bit of paper work but if we get you with him now it would be fine?" She asks.

"Yes please, no one too young, or too soft." I say gently. I'm not trying to up myself here, but I'm not good with people and give me a big soft kid is probably make jokes that would offend him and I wouldn't even know.

We walk passed so many blocks in this building until were at the last hall way of the building. It's dim, not even lit well and the walls are an even more disgusting colour than the walls in the rest of the building.

"This is block H. It's for uh, long time offenders or kids that do unspeakable crimes really." She gulps.

"They can't be that unspeakable or they would be put in real prison."

"The one in this block that has done the worst crime is only 13 years old and is unable to be put in real prison. We had a 17 year old that was convicted into jail though. This boy though, has murdered his mother, father, brother and raped his sister before then killing her as well." Chloe shudders.

"That's sick." I gasp. I wanted someone interesting not a fucking psycho.

"I know. The boy also has signs of depression and was diagnosed with schizophrenia at the age of 7. He committed his crime when he was 12 and due to his illness he was admitted here instead of real prison. He stays at the back, with nurses and doctors trying to help him. His crime doesn't go unnoticed but we have to keep in mind he's ill. Obviously we can't put you with him as you're a volunteer but we just want to show you what type of people stay here." She rambles.

Twelve years old and he's murdered his whole family. He must have been in such a bad place. Or voices in the back of his mind pushing him to do it. It makes me wonder what he was thinking when he did it. The pain and anger he must have felt. It's still sick though.

"You'll be put in the first cell with one of our lighter offenders. He's done countless robberies, he was accused of man saluter but was pleaded innocent. But he has got into countless fights and one of his victims is in hospital now on life support so he's still on trial for that. He's one of those people that had done too many things and the fact that someone he's beaten up might die pushed it over the edge and now he's here. He's only been here for two weeks. He doesn't speak much to my memory."

"Oh, that's not too bad." I shrug. If he's in the block I thought he would be some bad ass.

"We wouldn't assign you with someone who has the possibility to put you in danger." She smiles at me. "He's a nice boy. One of the oldest in here.he shouldn't be too bad." She smiles opening the door for me.

I can't see anything as I peak inside his cell. The lights are off and it's pitch black. Before I'm about to walk in Chloe stops me.

"Oh, and his name is Shawn. Shawn Mendes."