feelings: are a piece of shit||dairy

Dysphoria

11.1.2017

Hi everyone.
Today I want to talk about some thing called Dysphoria.
You might not know what that is so here is wikis explanation:
A state of not being comfortable in one's current body.
That's how it applies to me anyway.

So why do I feel uncomfortable on my body?

My boobs.

Yes my boobs.
I don't like them.
And I don't want them.

This may sound kind of funny to some people I feel uncomfortable with how big my boobs are.
And they aren't even that big.
But I hate it.
I want to strap them down to my chest. I hate them.

This may sound really pathetic, but I cried about this.
It was just after Christmas and I got a twenty øne piløts shirt.
And it was a little tighter then usual, if I could I would have picked a size bigger.
But I still wanted to wear it cause it's twenty øne piløts.
And I put it on and looked in the mirror and I cried.

I never through I would hate how I look, but there I am hating it.

Like a lot.

For practically an hour I tried finding things to make my books look smaller, something like a binder.

I came across a bando, I wore that and it flattened my chest a little bit.
Like not by that much, but it made me a little bit happier.
Not by much, but by a bit.

So this may sound supper silly, but friends out there, if you don't know what I want for my birthday this year (even though it is ages away) I would really appreciate a chest binder.
If you don't know they are google it.

So yeah that was the update on my life, Dysphoria

~Sammy