It was finally time for the concert. Jacob got me another wheelchair and rolled me into the trunk of the limo. "A bit rude, isn't it Jacob?" I asked sarcastically. I had to shout for him to hear me from the seats. The Killer Klown with a capital K started the car and my wheelchair rolled around in the small trunk.
Ten minutes later, we arrived at Jacob Street where some people were still sweeping up the millions of dead girls. As soon as the door opened, the billions of girls who were still alive screamed and jumped to Jacob, trying to get a selfie with him.
'Any moment now, he'll open the trunk...Right?' I thought to myself. Of course not! He's Jacob Fartorius, my sworn, idiotic enemy. And I had broke both his arms. It was a wonder how he didn't hate me. Yet.
"Will someone open this trunk?" I screamed and punched the top. I heard pounding on the other side and knew that there were crazy little girls standing on the limo to get to Jacob. Goodness knows how far the little monsters would go to get to their idol!
"OPEN THE TRUNK YOU IDIOTS!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. Suddenly, I was blinded by sunlight as the trunk door was thrown open. "Thank you!" I sighed and rolled out.
"EMMA WATCH OUT!" Jacob screamed and suddenly fell on top of me. He jumped off the wheelchair and stood at the back, then wrapped his broken arms around my neck. "GO! GO! GO!"
I wheeled the wheelchair as fast as I could, and ran over dozens of people in the process. "NOOOOO!" Jacob screamed. A billion girls started pulling his legs and he tumbled off the wheelchair. I, for one, was happy because he had been choking me. I didn't stop rolling myself out. I looked over my shoulder and saw the evil girls dragging Jacob by his feet into their crowd. He slid his hands across the ground and tried to stop them, but they were too strong. I looked back once again, but he had disappeared into the mob. Was it strange that I felt a bit of pity for him?
I shuddered, imagining what those beasts were doing to Jacob. Would he even be alive to do his concert? Who knew?
I wheeled myself to the big concert room and onto the stage. The stage lights were off, so I flicked them on. The crowd instantly cheered, thinking I was Jacob. With aching arms, I rolled my wheelchair to the center of the stage, and everyone booed when they saw me.
"Okay, no need to be rude. I have a very tragic announcement. Fortunately-I mean unfortunately-you brats killed your own idol."
Le gasp from audience.
"That's right. You killed Jacob Sartorius. I have tried for over a year now, and it seems that Jacob could only be killed by his loyal fans. Very tragic, I declare. Very tragic indeed that it wasn't me who finished him off!" I shouted. Another gasp from the audience. I slammed my fist on the handle of my wheelchair and winced. "Jacob Fartorius is-"
"Here to stay!" Jacob said from beside me with a wide grin. Half his hair had been yanked off his scalp, and bruises covered his red skin. And of course, his arms still hung limply at his sides. His fans cheered like lunatics.
"No way you survived those savages!" I cried and poked his cheek to see if he was real. He was. He took the back handles of my wheelchair and wheeled me to the backstage. "Hey! Stop it!"
He handed me several shoe boxes. "What the heck?" I asked.
"Here. You throw these to the audience when I say 'I love you like a fresh pair of Jordans.' Okay?" he asked.
"No, not okay! Why should I help you?"
"Because you're my wife!"
"Fine!" I evilly laughed inside. A good plan would have to be made.
~~~
"I love you like a fresh pair of Jordans!" the huge speakers said, and Jacob moved his lips to lip sync it.
"Ok, Emma. Now!" he whispered to me. I was awkwardly sitting by him the whole concert, and now was my time to "shine."
I picked up thirty shoe boxes of Jordans and hurled them at the audience. The screams were deafening! I killed at least five girls by aiming the boxes at their heads.
I still had 70 more boxes to throw. Jacob tried to discretely gesture for me to throw them, but I just shook my head with a grin. I lifted 40 at once and threw them right at Jacob. "You love Jordans right? Well take them!" I jumped up,ignoring my broken back, and stuffed one in his mouth and used another to slap him across the face. He fell down and I put one foot on him.
"I have conquered Jacob!" I announced. "And I have billions of witnesses. Ow, my back!" I fell back onto my wheelchair, but I didn't mind. I rolled it over Jacob's body 69 times.
"Nooooo. I must finish the concert!" Jacob crawled to the microphone and pushed it to him with his arms. "B-I-N-G-O!" Everyone started cheering again, but went silent when Jacob suddenly went unconscious.
"He's dead!" I said. I rolled out the back door and tried to remember the directions to the hospital so I could finally get my back fixed.
"Emma Sartorius?" a voice suddenly asked. I looked up to see a hooded person leaning against a wall with a hat pulled over his face. Where had I heard that voice before???
"Don't call me that!" I said with disgust and rolled my eyes. In a flash, the guy came up to me and blindfolded me. "HEY!" I screamed and tried to kick him, but I couldn't. He picked me up and threw me into the back of his van. "Why would you want me? My back is literally broken!"
"Because you have information on Jacob Fartorius, my sworn enemy who-"
"He's my sworn enemy!" I retorted.
"We both know you didn't kill him just now." And he slammed the door shut. Sigh. This was the second time in a day I was locked in a trunk.
"Who are you?" I shouted.
"Two words. Justin. Beaver."
~~~~
DUN DUN DUN!!!!! by snowgolem
