"HE CANNOT DIEEEEE," I screamed to myself as I paced around the room. I had to think of something fast, Jacob would be back from the studio soon and I still don't have a way to kill him.
"Aha," I smiled to myself as I pulled my majestic beard off my face and entered it. I looked around until I noticed a frat fat boy standing behind a counter. I looked around the hairy area until I noticed I shop that read 'things that might kill Jacob fartorius.'
I furrowed my eyebrows as I walked in the doors. And noticed that the same frat boy was behind the counter of the shop. I saw deadly lasers that looked interesting to me. I picked up a pack of 69 and walked to the counter.
"What do these do?" I asked.
"You attach them to the side of the door frame and when someone walks through them, poof they get burned to ashes, instantly!" That fat guy said as he pulled a piece of lint of the beard and ate it.
"Mmm, hint of mustard." He said as he smacked his tongue on the roof of his mouth "with a hint of boogers!"
He walked out the beard with my pack of lasers and his my beard back so it wasn't noticeable.
I ran to the door and attached all 69 lasers and waited for my husband to walk in those doors.
I heard a knock on the door. I looked through the peep whole and saw Jacob with a bouquet of roses. I ran back to the couch and yelled that it was opened.
Finally. I thought as the door slowly opened and I instinctly farted up a dramatic music beat. As he walked in, he was blasted with all 69 lasers and he fell to the floor with holes all over his body,
69 to be exact.
I checked his pulse, nothing. But this happened before, NOOOOOO. HE WILL COME TO LIFE AGAIN, HE WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO DIEEEEE!!!!!
I started to cry so hard.
"Oh, no need o cry I'm alive," Jacob said from besides me.
"AHHHHHH," I screamed as he got up, only to reveal that the 69 holes had gone away.
I ran to my room and opening d my laptop, searching up how to kill Jacob Fartorius.
The result was something I never thought would be true. How am I going to do this?
I have to make him never fart again.....
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FINALLY AN UPDATE
Happy new years:)
GUYS IK THIS CHAPTER IN BORING AND NOT FUNNY, BUT that's bc next chapter will be funnier because she has to he rid of his fart
snowgolem you make the next chapter
~sou
