If ...

Chapter 26

Kendall POV

My head is throbbing . I knew it was a bad idea to drink like that.  I groan and try to get up .

I feel my head spinning . Bad idea . I lay back and try to calm the nauseous feeling playing in my stomach .

How much did I drink ?

I reopen my eyes and I am welcomed with a foreign ceiling  . Where am I ?

I look to my right and a big window is there . It's dark . What time is it and where am I ?

A panicked feeling starts making it's way up my heart .

I slowly turn my head to my left and I am startled by a tall figure sleeping on  a chair by the  bed I am laying on .

Holy molly . What is he doing here ?

And the sick fellings I had vanish and are replaced by ... safety .

I try to get up and I feel my stomach turn . Oh boy .

I ran towards the door inside the room who I presume is the bathroom's door . I quickly lean on the toilet seat and empty my stomach  .
During my disgusting act I feel a presence behind me .

All the drinks I had are making their way down the toilet .

His hands grab my hair out of my face and I shake my head for him to leave .

I don't want him seeing me this way .

After emptying my stomach , I lean on the wall for a moment trying to catch my breath and wait for one of his hurtful sarcastic comments to come out  .

Nothing  .

I get up and rince my mouth. I look at myself in the mirror .

Who am I ? who is this girl in front of me ?

All I see are Dull eyes , pale skin , dark circles , cracked lips .

I guess Cara leaving was the last string holding me together and  finally threw me off the edge .

I have been standing on that edge for quite a time now .

I am tired . All I ask for now is to be the girl I was two months ago . The girl that only did one thing . Laugh . I used to spent the whole day with my mouth open and tears pouring down my face . Happy tears .

Look at me now . My brother is dead , my dad is dying , my mom  turned to a complete stranger , my sister is taking care of herself  at the age of eighteen , my best friend is leaving , my ex-best friend is blaming me .

And if this doesn't hurt. Then what does ?

I splash cold ice water on my face and dry it with a towel .

Cristiano is sitting on the edge of the bath tub . Staring intensly at me .

I feel as if he can see through my soul .

I look at him from the mirror.

And I do the thing that never in my entire life thought I would do .

I feel my body gravitate towards his and before I know it . I am kneeling in front of him .

He looks at me confused .

My brain is shut . I am looking for some reason but there is none .

My body is being controlled by emotions . Emotions I can't  recognise now .

The next thing I know is my lips finally meeting his .

He stays still first by my very sudden action , but quickly recovers and his mouths starts moving in sync with mine .