The Dance

Chapter 113 Past, Present, Future

Jill felt Jake push her towards Matt as a gust of wind hit her back. She closed her eyes and began walking faster in his direction until she stood toe to toe with him. They stood so close to each other with out touching that Matt could have sworn he heard her heart beating, or maybe it was the sound of his heart racing. Blue eyes stared into green eyes. She wanted to touch him but she shoved her hands in her pockets to stop the impulse. It was too easy to let their physicality take over. This was about words now, hurtful words.

"I've missed you." She finally broke their silence.

"I'm sorry." Matt didn't break eye contact.

"I should have never asked you to leave." Jill fought back the tears.

"I should have given you time to tell your own story." Matt reached to touch her cheek but dropped his hand back to his side. If he touched her now, it would only keep secrets hidden.

"I would like to tell you my story if you don't have anything better to do."

Matt looked around at the empty beach and back at Jill. "Seeing as I have all the time in the world..."

"Where do I begin?" Jill looked for a starting point in his eyes.

His eyes smiled back at hers. "Why don't you start at the beginning?"

Jill motioned that they walk and talk. Matt followed beside her listening intently as she recounted her story.

"We met by accident. I was the "classic" starving art student and he was an aspiring chef. We used to commiserate over drinks at the bar he worked at.  They always had ladies night and free food to attract the guys who came in to troll for women. Jake caught on pretty quickly I wasn't there for the company and always sent me home with a doggie bag of some new recipe he had made. When  I lost my roommate, I offered him the spare room to help cut costs. He would handle the cooking. I would do the cleaning and we would split expenses. Somewhere along the way, it evolved into something more than friendship and we fell in love. I concentrated on graduating from art school and he saved money to go to culinary school. Our future was set."

Jill stopped and picked up a rock and skipped it across the water. "I guess God had a different plan for me. I had been blessed as one of Savannah's up and coming artists. We felt comfortable enough to buy a small home and began renovating it. I had come home one night and found the table set for dinner and a note from Jake. He had gone out to get a bottle of wine with dinner." Jill paused and looked at Matt. "Funny thing is, I don't really care for wine." Jill continued her story.

"The note read there was a surprise for me in the bedroom. I found the box and found the most beautiful piece of lingerie in it. He had a penchant for sexy lingerie."

"Doesn't every man?" Matt looked out at the water trying not to imagine what she must have looked in that gown. They returned to walking and talking again.

"I changed into the gown and waited for him to return but he never came back."

"What happened? Did he get cold feet?"

"No, Mattie. He was killed by a drunk driver. It killed him instantly and I died that night also."

Of all the things Jill could have told him about Jake why did it have to be a drunk driver. Matt had struggled with alcoholism and his sobriety was still in its early stages. He wanted to walk away now and spare her anymore pain. He knew more than ever, he could never relapse if they were destined to be together.

She recounted her quick departure from Savannah and her sojourn through the northwest and Canada trading on her looks for basic food and shelter.

She wasn't that much unlike him. His past was pretty colorful. He knew she had a past but he never, ever expected that her past would rival his.

"I found myself in Canada. I finally met someone that saw me for who I was and slowly put the pieces to my heart and soul back together."

"But why me? I already told you about my drinking problem." Matt was resigned to his fate.

"Sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants." Jill reached into her pocket and pulled out the blue box and held it flatly in the palm of her hand.

"What's that?" Matt eyed the box as the one that usually contained a ring.

"Are you proposing to me?" Matt tried not to smile.

"Open it." She handed the box to Matt.  He hesitated not knowing what to expect from her.

Matt slowly opened the box to reveal the contents. "It's empty." He was confused and looked at her with questioning eyes.

"I sold the ring." She looked at him and then the ground and back to him.

"That empty box is a fresh start for me." She hesitated and took a deep breath. "And for you, if you want to start this dance all over again with me."

Matt moved closer to her. She froze in place waiting for him to say something, anything to erase the silence that followed her last comment.

"Jillian Heather, will you dance with me?" He wrapped his arm around her waist not even waiting for her to answer.

A wave of relief washed over her. "I'll dance with you for the rest of my life, if you'll have me, Matthew Brown."

As the sun began to set, the two slowly danced to the sounds of Alaska's orchestra. Matt suggested they take the dance to the Integrity where they could have some privacy. He wanted nothing more than to make love to her at the very instance.