Diary of a homo | PewdieCry

Dear Diary (10 of February 2014)

10th February. 2014

Dear Diary

Just four days and Felix's presence makes me happy. So happy! By the end of the play he came to visit me and gave me a rose saying how he enjoyed the play. I smiled at him to express my happiness, but Lacie interrupted us. She took him away and Felix waved me goodbye.

I had to hurry home tho, because it was so late. I hoped and prayed for my father not to be at home but it was all in vein. He beat me, but as always that wasn't enough for him so..

He raped me again, diary..

But I'm taking care of the pain right now.

I take my blood and make a smiley face next to my last sentence. I close my diary and stuff it inside my bag. I sit and stare at my arms. The blood was dripping from the wounds I made with my father's shaving razor.

I gazed at my body and squinted a little, just to have a better view of all the cuts that monster did. I sigh and with trembling hands I throw the razor away into the darkness. I put a small smile upon my pale face and take a deep breath.

"I'll run away" I murmured "One day I will and leave everything behind." I waited about 15 minutes until I stopped bleeding.

With a bit of difficulty, I managed to get on my feet and stand like a proper human. I looked around the room and looked for my school bag.

"Will that day be today?" I asked myself and began to pack the little amount of clothes I had. "Yeah. That'd be safer." I smile weakly and stuff every single one of my belongings inside and slipped my clothes on.

Black dirty skinnies, a green long sleeved shirt and a grey beanie. I walk to the kitchen and look for the cookie pot I hid under the counter, looking for money I managed to save up and hide from him. I take the pot out and break it, it was ceramic, and start counting what I had.

Near $125

"That's not enough.." I sigh and stuff the money inside my pocket. I took my notebook out and wrote a small letter for my father so he could read it when ever he decided to appear. I walked to the stove and looked for the snacks I had bought a few weeks ago for school.

I stuff them inside my bag and then I grabbed a kitchen knife. I hid it inside my sleeve, just in case some thief wanted to rob me. Selfdefense son.

Taking a deep breath, I walk out my home and let my feet guide me to wherever they thought more convenient for me to stay.

The street was calm and had a few people walking around. A father was playing with his son while his wife and his daughter prepared the sandwiches for the two to eat. I smiled sadly and gazed up at the sky, noticing the dark clouds. I stop walking and take a deep breathe, closing my eyes.

Its been a long time since I last felt so calm and peaceful.

I then feel a circle fall onto my cheek. Soon enough, the drop of water slid down my pale skin. Another drop followed silently until they were a lot more, making their presence as they soaked everything that it touched.

"It's raining!" I hear a small kiddo scream while giggling, causing me to chuckle to myself.

"I love rain" I muttered and started walking again. My green shirt turned into a lot darker color, and my jeans started feeling heavy. I took my beanie off, to shake my head and let the drops fall randomly around me. I stuffed the beanie inside my bag and then, I saw where my feet was dragging me to.

School.

Sighing, I made my way to the back of the Gym, hoping the door wasn't locked. Figures it was.