Forgetting Roman

{nineteen}

{nineteen}

                On the second floor, I pushed open door after door hoping to find a bathroom- instead I found couples half naked or already doing the dirty deed. It wasn’t until I was half way done with the floor that I found a bathroom that wasn’t occupied.

                Inside, I shut the door behind me and flicked on the light. Surrounded by the plain baby blue walls of the bathroom, I was finally able to breathe. Downstairs there had been no room for comfortable breathing. Everything was congested and the air was polluted with the aroma of sweat, alcohol, and weed.

                I was relieved to be able to inhale somewhat clean oxygen up in here. The smell of sweat and weed still lingered in the air and I figured it was either because it had stuck with me or because so many people had already come up here for a bathroom break.

                Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I pushed back my side swept bangs and sighed. My heavily applied black eyeliner was slightly smudged underneath my eyes from perspiration. With my eye make-up applied so darkly, my face looked so pale it nearly looked as if I had applied white paint onto my face.

                “Breathe,” I whispered to myself. I could feel the memories starting to climb over the tall and thick wall I had built. With practically everything that I had walked away from surrounding me, I could feel the strong urge to go ahead and let loose again. I couldn’t do that again- I wouldn’t let myself. “Breathe.” I repeated as I pushed myself away from the sink and fixed my dress.

                After I cooled down a bit, I washed my hands, and turned to open the bathroom door. I needed to find Declan or Livvy- or a phone charger so I could connect my phone really quickly to send them a text I was going to head back to the dorms.

                As I opened the bathroom door, I was about to flick off the light when I heard footsteps echo down the hall. Out of the shadows, Roman stepped out. I nearly let out a groan. Seeing him was the last thing I wanted. Life really did have it out for me.

In a pair of black jeans and a regular red T-Shirt, he casually strolled in my direction, a small smile on his lips. “I finally have you all alone,” he said.

                In my chest, my heart began to beat rather quickly. I wasn’t sure whether it was because I was somewhat scared or because I hadn’t been this close to him and some part of me still longed for his drug.

                I hated to think it was the latter.

                I rather be terrified of him than want him anywhere near me again.

                Together, Roman and I weren’t a match made in heaven. We were completely alike, yet wrong for each other. I knew it from the beginning yet I didn’t care. I thought I needed him. I didn’t- I don’t.

                “What do you want?” I finally asked.

                Stopping a few feet away from where I stood just outside the bathroom, Roman crossed his arms across his chest and gave me a cold stare. “What every man wants,” he replied.

                “Money, women, and food?” I replied with a slight innocent tone in my voice.

                I just wanted this encounter to end, however the sarcastic in me wasn’t about to back down.

                Roman laughed. It was light and it brought memoires back that I wished to forget, just like I wished to forget all about him.

“Silly, girl,” he chuckled. “Every man needs a loyal woman by his side. Baby, isn’t it clear? I want to fix this—us. Because we were perfect together, flaws and all.”