SECOND CHANCES - Forgiving Isn't Always Easy

Chapter twelve: Say hi

"Sometimes, only one person is missing, and the whole world seems depopulated."

~Alphonse de Lamartine~

*****


“What are you doing here?”- Selen finally gathered her head enough to think clear for a moment.

“I’m here for my daughter.”- he simply stated and she felt uneasy. She knew she'd have to tell him eventually, but she hadn’t pictured it so soon.

“How did you find out?”- no point in denying it or faking dumb.

“What matters is that I know. Why didn’t you tell me?”- Alex inquired softly, as if afraid the wrong tone might scare her away.

“How could I tell you? It all happened so soon. I..”- she stopped for lack of words.

“Four years isn’t soon.”- he spoke again, remaining apparently calm, though there was that storm again in his eyes and it  warned her; though to what, she didn’t now. After all she had only seen the charming, abandoning, formal and then kissing side of him. Though if they were any sign to his character, he would be as tremendous in anger as he was passionate in …. Well she didn’t dwell on that at the moment.

“You forget I didn’t  know who you were for four years and I had the false idea, surely, that you didn’t want anything to do with me.”- irony struck her when she was mad.

“So you tell  me, how could I run to a man who left me after he had sex with me, and to top it all up it was my first time, and tell him as if nothing that I was carrying his child?”

“I explained to you why I had to..”

“Yes, you did”,- she cut him off, -“ four years too late.”

Upon hearing her accusative voice, Alex could help buy feel a tightness in his chest. He knew she was right, he had beat himself about it constantly; yet he couldn’t stop the hurt of not knowing and the years lost.

“Look Alex, I don’t want to fight over this. I understand your reasons, but you have to understand mine. And right now I can’t do this… My baby is laying in that room,”- she pointed at it , -“ and I’m frightened…”- her  voice shivered when she spoke those last words.

“Everything will be fine!”- he tried to reassure them both, ignoring that gut wrench feeling that stuck by him ever since he read the message Bill sent him.

“What if it doesn’t.. What if..?”- a cry caught up with her and her hand instinctively covered her mouth.

“I can’t lose her..”- it was a plea more than a statement.

“We won’t!”- Alex said, embracing her crying body with his. Their situation was messed up, if they had one at all, but the only thing he knew clearly was that he was going to do anything for his baby's and Selen's sake. And that was a promise!

The door opened and the nice nurse who had fed Hope came out. Slowly they broke the hug and Selen wiped her tears.

“How is she?”- she asked anxious.

“She is a strong little girl. I have to tell  you… you have the sweetest little child. She is so witty and funny and smart for someone her age.”- the blonde haired lady said. Her eyes told the tale of an experienced woman, so blue, yet so sad. And it was that sadness that terrified them both.

“Look, I have worked in this hospital for 27 years now. I have seen all kinds of things, all kinds of sicknesses and all kinds of patients, so believe me when I tell you to have faith. Have faith that she is going to make it. My eye has never lied to me once.”- she comforted and smiled at them.

Within seconds of her departure, Alex and Selen approached the door.

“Are you ready to see your daughter?”

“Yes,”- he let out nervously, after taking two deep breaths.

Quickly then, she opened the door and left it wide so, so that Alex could step in when he was ready. If she had learned one thing about him, was that whenever he was nervous he would clench his hands tightly and breath deeper than usual.

“Mommy!!”- she squeaks out in her oh so very lovely childish voice.

“Hey baby. How did you like your nanny?”

“A lot! She told me the special tale.”- Hope whispered out, clapping her teeny tiny hands together in excitement.

“Why are we whispering and will you tell mommy the tale?”- Selen said, also in a whispery voice.

“Cause is a special tale and only good and brave children should know it. “- her baby spoke in a self proud manner that almost made her burst out laughing.

“And I’m not a good child?”- Selen teased her daughter, pouting her bottom lip to fake sad.

At that moment, Hope's giggles filled the room and both Alex, who was standing at the door, and Selen's hearts were filled with the indescribable joy that only a parent feels.

“You are not a child mommy”- Hope let out between giggles.

After a few minutes of Hope laughing and Selen tickling her tummy, the situation finally became normal and quiet. Enough so that Selen could make the expected introduction.

“Baby, what is the one gift you ask Santa for every year?”- she said and her little angel's face went sad.

“A daddy,”- she muttered and hang her head down.

“But Santa doesn’t like me. ..”- she said half-voice-ly.

“Why do you think that?”

“ Because he never brings my gift.”

“What if I told you that Christmas came earlier today?”

‘Christmas can’t come earlier mommy. It’s on December 25-th. I’m not a child anymore,”- she protested.

“Alright Tigress. What if I told you then, that Santa  decided to sent you your present earlier, because he saw what a good little girl you have been?”

“Really?”- and her eyes sparkled the sweet blue whenever she was happy, like they went full grey when she was angry or sad. Guess she got the best of both worlds..

“Yes, really. And what if I told you that he is standing at the door, impatiently waiting to meet you? “
Without a word her eyes traveled behind her mother’s shoulder and froze at the sight of a large man at the door. Selen was really tall, but she felt like a dwarf near Alex, as he towered her even when she wore heels. She was surprised Hope wasn’t frightened by the giant of a father she had, whose mere presence at the door made it impossible for any light rays to fight their way in the room. Thank Heavens the light switch was on in the room.

‘Are you my daddy?”- she asked the man who was a stranger to her and yet Selen could tell her child felt no fear. Unfortunately she couldn’t say the same for Alex.

“Mommy I think daddy has gone mute,”- she said and Selen chuckled; which in turn wasn’t funny to Alex, who had now sweat even down his toes. Facing his daughter for the first time was an experience like no other. The man who kept cool even in the toughest situations, felt now as if he had lost total control and was at the mercy of the three year old miracle that looked right into his very core.

“Say hi to  your father,”- Selen said and getting up , she stood in between them, though making sure not to block anyone’s view.

“Hi!”- Hope blurted out and excitement was the one word that could be read throughout all her face and body.

Do you know what’s it like to see your father for the very first time? Do you know what’s it like to wake up and not have him there? Do you know what’s it like to see other girls with their dads and turning your head left and right to see yours? And do you know what’s t like when no matter if you turned that head 180 degrees around, he still wouldn’t be there?

You might not, but Hope did. Until now. 

--A/N--

Hello guys, I know the song is in Turkish, and no I'm not Turkish,  but I love it so much and thought it'd fit right in.

It's a song the daughter sings to her father telling him to tell her a fairytale with all kinds of stuff in it, but the most important part of the song for me has got to be when she asks him to hold her hand whilst telling it and never let go even if she falls asleep.

I know this is weird for those of you who don't speak Turkish (and those who do: here is a new song for ya all) but it's a very emotional song :)

Sorry for the long song talk :(

Hope you enjoy this new part and as always let me know.

VOTE AND COMMENT!

Love you all 😘😘