1. I tried being normal, worst 5 seconds of my life!
2. I tried talking to my ex, let's just say I hung up. Haha, I'm kidding. I haven't even been in a relation yet. Livin' that single life.
3. If people could read my mind, I'll probably be dead right now.
4. I have more conversations in my head than I do in real life.
5. I need my glasses to find my glasses. See my problem?
6. Few woman admit their age, few men act theirs.
7. I hate when somebody else has the same name as me. It's like a competition and we obviously know it's one that I'm not losing.
8. Shutting down my computer and then realizing I need it again.
9. What I sound like in real life and a recording are two different things.
10. My mom walked in on me watching Mary Poppins and she called me a loser. Guess she doesn't understand Grandma's generation.
YOU ARE READING
The World's Funniest Shit
HumorJokes, comebacks, insults, quotes, yo mama's, and other meaningless funny shit. I try to find some you haven't heard before because that's just lame if you've heard the same thing again and again. MUST READ if you don't I can't do anything but still...