Roxan ~ In My Life with the Beatles

67

Strength

Days pass and I got stronger, we have a great routine going and I can't believe he's the same man, nothing too much trouble, no request denied.

"I've organised a big surprise if you think you're up to it?!" John held something behind his back and every time I tried to grab for it he moved away.

"Spoil sport, out with it, what is this big surprise - a trip grocery shopping just won't cut it." I sit down on the couch and cross my arms not entirely convinced he could pull off a 'wow' surprise maybe just a 'ok that's nice' one.

"We, my dear, are going sailing on a yacht!"

"A what? A yacht where did you-...... that's an awesome surprise, and here I was thinking grocery shopping!" As he flopped on the couch with me he hands me the leaflet, a bright yellow yacht floating in the ocean, white sails billowing "Oh it looks beautiful, like the one on Sydney Harbour! Thank-you" I kissed him on the cheek and hugged his arm "When, where, what to wear?!"

John glanced at the clock above my head "When? - Well let's get you dressed and go so- Now! I'll get the sunscreen, hats and your coat- you get something nice on- sailing gear!"

I struggled to get dressed quickly but managed to sort myself in under an hour a feat in my Chemo world, the phone was ringing and John answered while I was in the bathroom.

"That was Linda, they'll be back tonight!"

"Yay, that's wonderful. I miss them all so much Sophie especially of course so, so much" I hugged John and we left in a happy mood for the harbour.

After the torrential downpour the night before, today was fine, clear and calm.

As we sailed the coastline I pointed out some dolphins which John took photos of, we also got some photos of us taken by the captain, John sneaking the captains cap on for a couple of shots. He looked so like my John from long ago.

The sun reached a zenith and light snacks were served I ate a minuscule amount which John berated me for but I wasn't chancing eating and being sick while aboard the yacht.

We sun-baked, well I was fully clothed but John discarded his shirt, which made it hard to watch the ocean for a while. Watching the gulls float along on the breeze beside the boat took much of the afternoon, they landed here and there hoping for a crust or scrap from the remnants of lunch.

Glorious clear skies and a light wind made it so beautiful, I felt more alive than I had in ages.

But as the ship turned to head back to harbour I turned with it.

Melancholy set in. The carnival that was me and John these last few days would be over, real life would meet us on our return, children, family. With Linda back would John leave? Would we go back to the 'friendly ex' tag or somehow entwine Sophie, Sean, my illness and everything into a new era.

I stopped myself there, I wouldn't let the storm clouds of my thoughts kill the sunshine I was in right now.

"Hey -up, stop thinking, it's bad for ya" John nudged me out of my stupor and I hugged my knees to my chest. ".... go on then, I'll give you a penny for 'em..."

"Nah, just my brain trying to turn me dark and nasty, sunshine is trying to win at the moment so I don't want to jinx it"

"Well I certainly don't want dark and nasty unless it entails dirty, naughty bedroom stuff"

"Sod off you animal! How do you always turn a conversation around like that?!"

"Well that's an art form luv, I have an art for dishing up the saucy stuff, you, of all people should know that!"