A-Z German Brothers

U: Underwear

U: Underwear

Ludwig was pretty sick and tired of doing everything in the shared household . He swore his brother just drank beer all day, so he decided to give him one easy and simple task.

He asked Gil to do laundry.

It was not like cooking where he could burn the house down or poison them. He was not vacuuming so he could not strangle himself with the cord or fall down the stairs. He was not dusting so he could inhale lemon pledge.

He was just washing several loads of laundry. How hard could that honestly be? How destructive could it be?

Ludwig soon realized that Gil doing laundry was destructive. To his patience.

Gil had agreed after a while of arguing to wash the laundry. So when Ludwig left around dawn, and when Gil got up at noon, he went and did just as he was told, like a good big brother.

He also folded the laundry and he did not fold it well at all.

When Ludwig got home to find the laundry done he was quite pleased. Gil was sitting on the couch watching TV, but when he saw Ludwig he turned off the TV and said in a somber voice. "We need to talk."

Those words had all the authority and dread of Fate and Death combined. Nothing like those two words could make someone think of every bad scenario possible.

Ludwig sat and looked at his brother, his eyebrow raised.

And very calmly Gil drew out from behind him a pair of Ludwig's underwear.

"What is this?" he asked, like a mother who found drugs in her sons sock drawer.

Ludwig stared at his brother. This was headed in a wrong direction. This was a freight train headed for a derailment and he made the fateful mistake of actually answering.

"Those are my underwear Gil."

Gil huffed "No Ludwig, these are whitey tidies. These are what toddlers, old men, and virgins wear. And this is probably the number one reason you do not have a girlfriend."

Ludwig sighed deeply "No Gil, they are what I wear. For the hundredth time if I wanted a girlfriend I would go and get one."

Gil shook his head "This is worse than a wedding ring. These are chick repellent. It is like going to the club in socks and sandals. All the pretty woman run away from you. They have x-ray vision. They can see the old man underwear."

Ludwig pinched the bridge of his nose but then smirked "On the contrary if they had x-ray vision they would see something and they would come running."

Gil insisted that these were unacceptable underwear for his little brother to have.

"These do not even look comfortable! My boxers are like fantastic, all soft and silky and these are like sandpaper. God Ludwig are you that big of a sadist that you need sandpaper underwear rubbing your dick all day?"

This conversation was rapidly wearing away at Ludwig's patience. Why couldn't Gil just do laundry without making critiques on his choice of underwear?

"You are totally exaggerating. These are not at all rough. They are cotton and they are perfectly fine. You are not wearing them for stop bothering me about it!"

"Damn right I am not wearing them! I am a man! I wear boxers! I am not an old man or virgin." He paused "WAIT LUDDY IS THIS A SIGN? ARE YOU A 21 YEAR OLD VIRGIN? IS THE KINKY STUFF JUST A BIG LIE?"

What was that breaking? It was crackling like thin ice...oh that was probably just the sound of Ludwig's sanity and patience shattering into little ity bity pieces that could never be put back together.

"My underwear does not...it is not a sign. My preference in undergarments means absolutely nothing..."

Gil stared not believing him.

"Gil I am your brother! I am clearly not a virgin so please just give me my underwear so I can go upstairs and focus on not murdering you!"

Gil would not relent "We are going shopping."

Ludwig glared "No we are not. I am not getting new underwear! These are perfectly fine!"

Gil glared "This is an emergency and you need new boxers right away. Do not worry brother, we can still save you. It is not too late!"

Oh no, it was far too late. It was very very late. Ludwig was done, very much done with his brother for the night. For the week maybe.

Ludwig ripped his underwear from Gil's hand and the moment he opened it to protest, Ludwig shoved it in his mouth and growled "Hope you washed it."

He then left his brother to choke on the underwear as he went upstairs for a nice relaxing murder plotting shower.

Sorry for the shortness..

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