Arbus: I love it when Cicuta calls me cute.
Miso: I love it when the guild’s microwave tells me my food is ready.
Jakal: My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch.
Miso: I call it lunch.
Anahita: Just saw 3 people jogging outside and it inspired me to get up and close the blinds.
Jakal: I like men with massive, throbbing vocabularies.
Romex: Why should we hire you?
Kit: I got first place on Rainbow Road.
Romex: Holy shit.
Anahita: Is she okay?
Aethor: She’s drunk.
Coventina: Of course I’m drunk!
Aethor: I’d take a bullet for you.
Aethor: Not in the head, but in the leg or something.
Fimbre: Five things I want in life.
Fimbre: First, a dog. Second, another dog. Third, a big house for my dogs. Fourth, a park to walk my dogs. Lastly, a partner who loves dogs.
Miso: I won’t be happy with technology until I can officially download food.
Miso: If I were a magician during every meal, I’d hear a constant drumroll in my head.
Miso: And when my food vanished I’d whisper “Ta-da”.
Vesta: Tell me a fact about farts.
Jakal: A human fart exits the body at 7 MPH.
Astral: That may be a trivial fact, but if someone can smell it 7 miles away, an hour after you farted, please consult your doctor.
[Tiamat is playing pretend with Panja and Alva]
Alva: The emergency exits are here, here, and here.
Tiamat: Now get the fuck off the plane! I don’t give a rat’s ass if you’re a doctor, we need our employees. Alva and I need to get back to the Second Continent!
Panja: I feel so wanted.
Coventina: Best friends don’t care if your house is clean, they care if you have kool-aid.
Viper: What’s a philosopher?
Kit: Someone who’s bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting.
Tiamat: That’s a guild for you.
Tiamat: They’ve got to enslave all the Wandering in this world and they make things complicated for them.
Alva: Fascinating.
Kami: Did you fart?
Osiris: No.
Kami: Really?
Osiris: Maybe it was a squirrel. Does it smell nutty?
Kami: No, it smells eggy.
Osiris: Weird… I didn’t know squirrels ate eggs.
Osiris:
Osiris: D’you think a chicken’s fart smells eggy?
Kami: No. So did you fart?
Osiris: Yes.
[Pearl is returning back to the Silver Heart]
Pearl: *speaks into walkie-talkie* This is Pearl coming back to Silver Heart. We failed the emergency mission, we’re all doomed.
[Static comes through the walkie-talkie]
Pearl: ALRIGHT IS ANYONE OVER THERE RECEIVING ME?!
Melody: *grabs walkie-talkie* You know I’m attempting to PREPARE dinner here!
Sniper: Allow me to handle this…
Sniper: *takes walkie-talkie* IT’S PEARL’S FAULT!!!
Pearl: Precisely my- WHAT?!
Miso: Hey, all I ever wanted was McDonald’s, but what I got was home cooking!
[At the Brotherhood]
Arion: *listening to walkie-talkie that was hacked into their channel* Hey Blootorn, want to hear something funny?
Blootorn: No.
[Back at Silver Heart]
Melody: Pearl, if I actually burn this dinner because of you, I swear to Titan I will make you go use your own money to buy takeout.
Pearl: But Melody, your lasagna is the best!
[Miso ate the lasagna while they were arguing]
Alfric: Miso!
Miso: What? I was hungry!
Silvanus: *sighs* Why can’t we just have one normal night.
