Anamnesis [Lacuna #2] {Completed}

Chapter Fifteen

"Intrepide (n.) Fearless"

November 1943

Shapes moved in the darkness. Bucky's vision faded in and out, blackness and blur. He didn't know how much time had passed. It could have been days or years for all he knew.

The coughing and pain in his chest had gone away, but it was replaced by something else. Something foreign. He felt... Bucky didn't know how to describe it. Everyday that seemed to pass, he began to feel each of his senses being tested and intensified. He felt stronger... but not in a good way. He began to not feel like himself anymore.

Everyday he felt as if he were candy taffy, being pulled and stretched to its limit. He wasn't sure how much more he could withstand before he snapped.

The only way he could differentiate between tests was the blue light. On the days his senses felt like they were being pushed, a blue light would fill the outsides of his vision and the days the blue light wasn't there, he knew they had left him to absorb whatever it was they were putting in him.

He saw images too. The things he saw were mostly of home. He saw Rebecca and their parents. Other times he saw his parents' graves where he had gone to visit countless times. He saw his house and the places he grew up. He sometimes saw Steve too. Sometimes he was back in Brooklyn, both of them thirteen year-olds again, fighting off bullies in an alley.

Sometimes the things he saw were a pleasant sort of relief, but most of the time the good things he saw were mixed with nightmares.

In the images, he saw his worst fears come to light. The bodies of those he loved would be scattered on a bloody battlefield or he would dream he was going home, but he would arrive only to realize he had brought the horrors of war home with him. Sometimes he saw his friends, Dugan, Gabe, and Matt, laying on the floor of their prison cages mutilated and bloody.

Sometimes he heard himself talking too, mumbling to himself as the blue light stood on the outskirts of his vision. What he was saying, he didn't know, but no one ever talked back.

The blue light was gone today, and he hadn't seen any images yet. He had been left alone to mumble to himself.

As he lay there on his metal bed, he thought he heard someone answer. "Bucky?"

            The voice sounded strange, like they were separated by a thick pane of glass and the sound was muffled.

"Bucky?" The voice called again, clearer this time. It sounded familiar, but Bucky couldn't tell if he was imagining it or not.

He was staring at the ceiling, unsure if he was awake or dreaming. His eyes wouldn't focus as a dark shape stood over him.

"Bucky, hey it's me." The familiar voice said.

Bucky turned his head slightly. His eyes came into focus and-

Oh he was definitely dreaming.

Steve Rogers stood over him. Well, it looked like Steve, only a much taller and more muscular version of his tiny best friend.

"Steve?" Bucky couldn't help but smile. This was a nice dream. At least he got to see him best friend one more time.

Steve smiled over him. "Yeah it's me buddy." The man who looked like Steve looked up and scanned the room. "Come on, we have to get you out of here." Bucky felt the straps at his arms and legs begin to loosen. Maybe he wasn't dreaming.

Steve sat him up, but Bucky felt dizzy. He tried to stand but stumbled. He thought he was going to fall and crush Steve, but then the strangest thing happened. He felt Steve set him upright with a strong arm. Was that muscle he was feeling on Steve's arm? Bucky looked him up and down.