Anamnesis [Lacuna #2] {Completed}

Chapter Twenty Nine

"Nepenthe (n.) something that can make you forget grief or suffering"

~Erin~

They talked for a long time.

Erin and Bucky sat side by side on the living room couch of the safehouse facing one another as he recounted to her all the things he discovered the last few days.

Erin listened intently, taking in all of his words. It was hard to look at him sometimes, watching the pain seep through his words like cracks in glass. Every now and then, her eyes would drift over to the family piano in the other room. Softly, in the back of her mind Erin began to hear a melody. She tucked away the thought for later.

When she looked back at him, she saw the weight of the world in his eyes as he continued to divulge everything he could recall. He told her where Steve had found him and that he was the one who convinced him to come back to her.

"I remember everything now." Bucky said quietly keeping his gaze forward. "The War, my friends, falling, everything after that... all of it." He turned his gaze to look at her. In the dark, Erin could see the anguish hidden behind the blue of his eyes.

She wasn't sure what to say. What could she do for him? How could she tell him it was okay when everything was far from it?

"Did you find out anything while I was away?" He asked her.

Erin hesitated. She had discovered so many things since he'd gone. She took a deep breath and told him. She recounted what Cara had told her and the video she'd given Erin. "You were right. You helped my mom. Do you remember why?"

Bucky paused recalling a memory. "I don't remember why exactly." He said, "All I remember is knowing that I had to. I don't know if it was because they stopped wiping me for a little bit while I was with the KGB or if it was a fluke." He shook his head.

Erin wanted to dig deeper, but she felt it was another mystery to be solved another time. "Buck, there's something else..." She hesitated, "I talked to Tony."

His eyes flashed to her, "What do you mean?"

"We ran into each other and... We talked."

Bucky's whole body went stiff as a question lingered in his eyes.

"He doesn't know about Steve and the team or you." She assured him, "I couldn't tell him." She paused. "I- I did tell him about the Infinity Stones, the Sanctum, everything we've discovered."

Bucky nodded his head, "Does he know anything about them?"

"He told me Thor said something about the Stones before he disappeared. Tony went to the Sanctum and talked to Wong. He's pieced together a theory, but I didn't ask him what it might be." She paused.

Bucky's eyebrows furrowed and he looked down.

"What is it?" Erin asked his softly.

He paused before answering, "I talked to Joseph." He admitted quietly. "I went back to the house one night, just to see it one last time. He... saw me and we talked."

Erin's lips parted slightly in surprise. She couldn't quite imagine how his great-grandnephew would react to seeing Bucky in his house. "What happened?"

"He-" Bucky cut himself off, "He said Rebecca never let them forget about me. He thinks I'm a hero."

You are. Erin wanted to say. But she knew Bucky didn't want to hear those words right now. He didn't need her words, he needed her to listen. Erin leaned forward slightly and took Bucky's vibranium hand. It was a small gesture, but he seemed so far away. She wanted to keep him anchored somehow. "Did he say anything else?"