Silent Cries ☾N.H.S

10| showering

❝ what made her strong was despite the million things that hurt her, she spoke of nothing, nothing, but happiness.❞

A/N: it's midnight and i'm really tired [yawns]. anyways, the last chapter wasn't the end as you can see :)

☾ 10 ☽

After a few hours I went downstairs. My mom would start to get suspicious if I didn't get up from my "sleep" soon. I gently placed Niall's letter in one of my cupboards on my desk, and then made sure to hide my muddy raincoat and leggings in my hamper.

Finding a seat at the empty table in the kitchen, I sat down and put my head in my hands, trying my hardest not to cry.

"Halo?"

I turned abruptly, hoping to find Niall, but only saw my mother's worried face.

"Halo, what's wrong?" She came over and sat by me, her arms hugging me.

I pushed the tears away. "Mom, I'm fine."

She smiled softly and said, "Okay, but go take a shower, you look a bit dirty. Your therapist will be here in a few minutes."

She got up and gave my shoulder a squeeze, causing fire to lace my arms as the injury burned. I sighed, and got up from the table. Walking up the steps to my room, I turned and faced the bathroom, my face contorted as I thought about entering the death trap.

I growled and shoved the door open, a sudden flare of anger blossoming at the pit of my stomach. Why did I have to go through all of this bullshit? Why is my life so fucked up?

I took off of my cotton shorts, and then stopped. My baggy sweater went just above my fingertips.

I whispered, "Walter?"

There was a hum in reply. I leaned against the sink and placed my forehead against the wall.

"You can't watch me undress, Walter. Get out," I whispered tiredly.

I felt a body press against mine, and a few seconds later the door to the bathroom creaked open, and then slammed shut behind him.

I didn't wait to step into the shower, but I kept my undergarments on just incase Walter somehow found a way to transport himself back in.

I turned the handle, and a soft sprinkle of cold water hit my body, making me shiver. I turned the knob further until a shower of warm water was hitting me. I took a ragged breath, and then another until my breaths where getting heavier and heavier.

Putting a hand on the side of the shower, I tried taking another breath to calm my choked ones. Water continued to enter my mouth, and I tried to spit it out with sobs choking my lungs. More water was entering my mouth, and I couldn't move, the shower was too small, every where I stepped there was water hitting me.

I brought my hands to my face and wept. I slid down the tiles, and brought my chest to my knees. A flashback of Niall disappearing under an ocean wave got stuck like a scratched video tape in my mind- only repeating the same images over and over.

I slipped even further down, until I was lying in a ball on the floor. My chest rose up and down with anxiety.

The water entered my mouth, and I did nothing to stop it. My lungs coughed feebly. I felt myself flicker in and out of reality. In one second I was stepping into a bright room, and in another I saw myself lying on the floor weakly. I stepped into the bright room again, this time the longest, my eyes saw Niall sitting on a couch. His head was in his hands as his body shook with cries. I started running towards him, but was caught in midair.