Pain (Danti) UNDER EDITING

Chapter 10

Students milled around the hallways, friends talking, couples kissing, enemies fighting. Itch's shoulder brushed against mine as we walked side by side down the hallway. I was staring at the floor, watching my shoes touch the white tiles that littered the ground. My hand brushed against my sweatshirt, the thin fabric brushing between my fingertips. 

Itch had a bright smile on his face. A grin that stretched from ear to ear. He had a skip in his step as he walked through the hallway. Unlike me, he could stay positive throughout any situation. I was in a dark place, a very dark place that I couldn't seem to get out of. The water that I've been treading in for so long in swallowing me whole. 

We walked through a small break of students. Itch was still looking forward, but I was staring down not making direct eye contact with any student here. 

"Hey, Itch?" I whispered. 

He turned towards me, a smile still on his face. "Yes Anti?" 

There was a brief silence before Itch grabbed my hand and pulled me to the closest abandoned classroom. The door squeaked when Itch yanked it open, it squeaked even louder when he slammed it shut. Small tears started to wash out of me in waves. Itch grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me into a secure hug. My fingernails dug into his back as I hung onto him for dear life. I started to sob in his warm embrace. 

"Why do I have to be like this?"

His grip tightened when those words squeaked past my lips. "I don't know Anti. There are so many known things in the world that will remain undiscovered. One of those things just happens to be burrowed deep inside of you." 

"I feel like I'm drowning." 

"It may feel like your drowning, but you need to keep swimming. If you stop then you fall to the bottom of that abyss and you'll never see the light again. You won't see us, or your future, or the lucky guy that will hold you when you fall asleep at night. As long as you tread that water, you'll be walking through the sunlight streaming through the trees." 

I cried and cried and cried. 

It was the only emotion that I could empty at this moment in time. The only emotion that unwound itself from the tightly wrapped bottle. My emotions dripped away with every tear that leaked from my tear ducts. Itch wiped away those emotions and replaced them with comfort and care. 

I whispered after a moment, "He hates me." 

"No, he couldn't ever hate you. He's overwhelmed with new emotions that he doesn't know how to handle. If you give him time, he'll give you the world." 

Itch was that one person that could comfort you when you really needed it. He would drop everything to be there for you. He'll even fix the situation if he could. He always knows when you need a hug or need to tell you that everything will be okay. There's always that inspiration to stay alive a little longer in Itch. 

I fumbled with a sleeve behind Itch's back, "I hate myself, so much." 

"I know." 

"Why can't I be like others? Why do I have to take out my pain with a knife?" 

He ran a hand across my back, "If you were like the others, then you wouldn't be that unique person that everyone wants to hang around. People would find you boring and bland. Like this, you have something that people will be drawn to. Sorta. Your knives are your safe haven. Without them, you would crumble. That pain would build inside you until it pours out of you in waves." 

"I don't know what I would do without you." 

"You wouldn't be here. Now, let's completely calm you down."