In My Eyes (Jughead and Betty)

J+B: Aftermath

Jughead pov

She didn't talk to me at school. In fact, she went to the nurse during English so she wouldn't have to see me. At lunch, she was nowhere to be seen. On the walk home, I felt like crying again but I didn't. I wanted to call her. I wanted to walk her home. I wanted to hold her. But I couldn't.

When I got home, I threw my backpack down angrily and marched to my room. I flopped down on my mattress and let out a long sigh. After a minute, I sat up and stared at my reflection in the mirror that was perched on my dresser. Dark circles made themselves at home under my eyes, my face was paler than normal, and my lip was curled. I ripped my beanie off and threw it at the mirror. She was the fire in me and now I was fading, my light was dying.

*a week later*

I did half of my homework before just giving up and putting everything away. I couldn't focus on anything right now. My dad called me to get dinner with him, but I just locked the door. I felt bad. He was going back later tonight to do another shift, but I couldn't bring myself to leave my room. I didn't sleep either. Everything had fallen apart in the blink of an eye.

My phone lit up. I hoped it would be Betty but it was just Archie. He never did meet me at Pop's. I was going to talk to him about everything but he chose not to come. So now, I chose to ignore him. I stayed up trapped in my thoughts until 6 a.m. I had to get ready for school. I showered and got ready reluctantly. I wore my light wash jean jacket and black pants with my hanging suspenders. I stared at my beanie. I wanted to wear it. I acted as if it kept me safe. But it didn't. When I was little, I was bullied a lot. So my mom bought me that same gray beanie and told me to cut a crown into it. "You're my prince. Don't let them hurt you." So I wore it practically every day since then.

It couldn't protect me. They could hurt me. I wasn't a prince. I was trash. I was heartbroken and I didn't know why. I walked slowly to school, without my hat. This was the first time I'd gone out in public without it since I got it. It scared me. It was just a hat. I'm fine. When I arrived at school everyone stared. They knew I never took off my hat. I walked solemnly to English, my first period. I was almost 20 minutes early, but I couldn't bring myself to go to the common room. I knew she didn't want to see me. I didn't want to make it harder for her. I would avoid her until I forgot her.

When the bell rang I saw her. Betty walked in wearing jeans and a hoodie. That wasn't her usual style. Her hair was down, covering her face. She walked to the back but stopped when she saw me. "Juggy, you're not wearing your hat." Her voice was low. I sat up straight.

"I know. I .. Betty." She seemed to have forgotten she was avoiding me because she shook her head and took a seat in the front. I dropped my head onto the desk.

Fuck.

When class started, Archie sat next to Cheryl and Veronica sat next to me. "Veronica can you find somewhere else to sit?" I snapped.

"Look I'm sorry about the other night. I wanted to apologize. I was just upset. I'll be moving to New York soon."

"I don't care."

"Why the hell are you so rude?"

"In case you haven't noticed, I lost the love of my life." I stopped. Did I just say that? Outloud?

"Mr. Jones, Miss Lodge if you will care to join us that would be great." The teacher said. I rolled my eyes.

Without a word, I gathered my bag and left the classroom. I let the door slam shut behind me. I started down the hall, determined to go home and lock myself in my room again. I heard footsteps behind me. I turned around to see Betty. "Where are you going?"

"Home." The anger was back. I didn't want to see her. After everything, she just broke up with me with some crap reason. I wouldn't let anything hurt me, with or without the stupid hat. This is the last time I care about someone who throws me to the wind.

"Please..."

"Please what?" I narrowed my eyes at her as she approached me.

"Jug, we need to talk. I'm sorry. I - I made a mistake." I had been waiting for her to say this but no. Now I was done. She would just leave again. I saw this happen with my family, with my mom. I was done letting anyone in, letting anyone touch my heart.

"You did, but that's your problem now. I'm done." I hated saying those words to her and it broke me to see her reaction. Betty coiled back as if I'd slapped her. Tears streamed down her face.

"Jug... I lo-"

"Don't. Don't say that to me again." As I walked away I knew I made a mistake.

Betty pov

I didn't see Jughead the rest of the week, not since our "talk" in the hall. I couldn't handle this. What had I done? He was the best thing in my life. He was my person. He was my family. I left him coldly and now I was getting payback. I deserved it. I didn't deserve him but I needed him. I knew I was selfish, playing with his heart like that. I couldn't remember why I left in the first place. I just flipped when I found out about my dad cheating. My parents always talked to me about how they were so in love, high school sweethearts, and then he started to cheat on her. He cheated on her and hit her.

I guess a part of me was scared that would happen to me. First Polly and Jason, then my parents. I was still scared. My parents were together for years and years and my mom thought he was in love with her. I hadn't even been with Jughead a year.

Archie called me. I had shut myself out for two weeks now. I should answer him. I couldn't shut myself away anymore.

"Hey Arch."

"Finally someone talks to me!"

"Sorry..."

"I know about you and Jughead. I've been trying to talk to you."

"Please I don't wanna talk about this."

"Do you want him back?"

"Yes..."

"Go to him. He just called me crying. Literally, crying because he misses you."

"But this week he told me he was done."

"Well Betty he was mad. I'd be mad too."

"You're not lying?"

"No. He had a breakdown, B."

"I'll go there now!"

"Uh wait."

"What?"

"There's something else I should tell you."

"What is it?"

"I um, I've been sleeping with Cheryl."

I paused for a moment.

"Since when?"

"Since you went to her house... she told me all about it. I'm sorry I kept it from you."

"Wow um okay. It's okay it's just weird."

"I know."

"Are you guys dating then?"

"I don't think so."

"Okay well I'm happy for you, I think."

He chuckled. "Thanks Betty. Now go get your man."

I hung up. I showered and got dressed in a pencil skirt and a cute top. I applied makeup for the fist time in forever and curled my hair. It all only took me about 40 minutes. I didn't see my mom as I left. She must be at the Register.

I walked fast to Jughead's trailer. I wanted to see him so badly. When I got there I knocked a little too long, but then I heard voices. One was Jughead's and one was ... Veronica?