An ordinary girl

chapter-16

"The problem with love is that sometimes it makes you forget the difference with love and hurt"

The confusion was increasing more and more with the passing time. It has been hours since I have been holding my phone and was trying to fight the dilemma. My respect was telling me that I just can't call him anymore because it was he who has insulted me and now also it should be he who should try to make the move. It has been more than 24 hours and still he hasn't called to apologize. He didn't even made an attempt to know whethet I was fine or not and this was the same person who once told me that he loves me with all his heart and would never leave me alone but now when I needed him he has deserted me. This was the thing which made it hard to accept the fact that he was the same person I have fallen in love with. My self respect was not permitting me to call him but my love was making it hard to control myself and I knew that I will soon give up.

After having little more debate with myself I decided that its high time and I need to talk to him. Dialing his number I waited for him to receive the call but after the ring the line went dead. Keeping the phone aside I thought that he must be busy that's why he wasn't able to receive it. Glancing at the clock I realized it was seven in the evening and right now he should be at his home and if he is at his home than he wasn't busy because I do know his family, they would never make him do any work. Picking up the phone I called him again but again the call wasn't answered. Convincing myself that he must be really busy I got up and started preparing dinner.

After preparing the dinner I came back to the room and decided to call my mother afterall she was the one who always has time for me. Dialing her number I waited patiently for her to receive it.

"Hello Sanaya" I heard her voice from the other side.

"Hello mumma. How are you" I asked her

"I am good. You tell what's going on? You had your dinner?" she asked me

"Nothing much mumma I just prepared my dinner and thought that I should talk to you first than I would have my dinner" I told her

"I hope that you are not eating anything unhealthy because you do know that you need to have healthy food and I don't want my daughter falling sick" she almost scolded me

"No mumma I am not eating anything unhealthy. Don't worry so much I am taking care of myself" I told her lovingly.

"I am your mother and I will worry about you. Now go and have your dinner its getting late" she said

"Ok. Bye mumma" I told her and ended the call. I realized that let it be anything but a mothers love will never change. She is the one who will always love us the same way as she has always did let it be any mistake we make or any crime we commit.

Getting the food from the kitchen I settled down on the couch and started browsing the channel and after few minutes I settle for a music channel. As I was about to start my dinner my phone rang, looking at the id I realised it was from Vansh. Taking a deep breathe I received the call.

"Hello" I said.

"You called me. Do you need something" he asked me without any emotions

"No I don't want anything. I juat called to see how are you?" I told him

"I am good" was his only reply

"Vansh why are you so upset with me? I didn't do anything, it was you who left" I told him honestly

"I left because of your stupidity. I really don't understand what your problem is. Why you have to create issue out of everything? Can't you see how hard I am trying?" he told rudely

His words hurted me deep but I didn't wanted to break down. Taking a deep breath I replied "Vansh I am understanding each and everything but I guess you don't want to look at things from my side. See we both have to make it work otherwise how are we gonna live together?"

"See this is the thing you always want to end the relation but I never said that" he replied harshly

"No Vansh I am not talking about ending the relation I am just telling you that this way its not gonna work and we both need to try harder" I told him

"Don't you try to turn it somewhere else. I know exactly what you meant by your statement. The thing is that you have never loved me and it is easy for you to leave me" saying this he ended the call without waiting for my reply.

I called him again and again but he didn't answered it. The fact that frustrated me the most was that he didn't gave me a chance to explain myself and he kept blaming me for everything. How could he say that I have never loved him. This thought increased the pain and the tears that I was trying to hold for awhile flew effortlessly. It wasn't the first time that he told me that, whenever I would try to keep my views and state my point this was the answer I got. This is the very thing which makes me question what am I doing with him when till date he hasn't been able to see my love. Why each time the complications have to increase? Why is so hard for people to understand the other people? Getting up I kept the untouched food in the fridge knowing that the appetite was long gone. Grabing my phone I walked to the the washroom and washed my face trying to get rid of the tears. Looking at my face in the mirror I saw the change that he has brought to me. The bubbly and the carefree girl was long dead and now I was a totally different person. This is the thing that love has done to me. It has made me forget my very own existence and made me a person which I myself doesn't recognize anymore.

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