Lifeline {joshler}

twenty five (a)

tw: suicide, death, loss, self harm. this is the SAD ending. here is a link to a list of suicide hotlines: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines . You are never alone okay, never!

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Josh started crying harder at Tyler's statement.

Dr. Long was distraught, she wanted more than anything to intervene but she didn't know how. The usual protocols didn't seem to be appropriate. So, she had to trust that Tyler would save him.

"No, no it's too late. They'll send me away now; I'll be in a place like this forever. My life is nothing without you, my life is nothing." Josh ranted, broken.

"Josh, don't say that." Tyler pleaded, squeezing his eyes shut as tears fell from them.

"Why not? it's true." Josh spat. "You were the best thing that ever happened to me, I'm sorry I wasn't enough."

Tyler let out a strangled cry as Josh pushed the shard deep into his chest.

"I love you, no!" He screamed, grappling at his shoulder as Josh slowly slid down the wall. "You were enough Josh; you are enough please don't go." Tyler sobbed. Josh smiled weakly as Tyler held him in his arms. Tyler stroked his hair out of his face clutching him tightly as thought it would be enough to save him.

"Stay with me. Stay for me." Tyler tried to bargain but Josh's eyes had already started to glaze over as he bled out furiously.

Dr. Long grappled for towels and sheets, her and Adam ripping them and bundling them before Adam ran for help. Dr. Long dropped to her knees, her hands were shaking as she put the cloth over the seeping wound, she placed Tyler's hand over it, pushing down hard.

"Tyler, keep it together now. I need you to apply pressure." She replied frantically.

Tyler couldn't stop looking at Josh's face, the pain in his chest unbearable.

"Tyler!" She shouted. He finally tore his eyes away from Josh for just a second to look at the older woman, "push down hard." She said through gritted teeth. He did what he could. "Talk to him keep him talking, k-keep his eyes open." She continued.

Tyler looked at Josh desperately. He was cradled in his arms as he sobbed, his eyes glassy and leaking a few tears as he looked at Tyler's face.

"It's okay." Josh's voice was breathless but he managed to lift his arm to cup Tyler's face. "Now your life is free. I won't hold you back, you can go-" he strained against the discomfort, Tyler instinctively pushed down harder on his wound.

"No don't go, no Josh please don't." Tyler begged. But Josh's eyes were already drifting to the ceiling.

"It's okay. It doesn't hurt anymore." Josh promised his voice quiet.

"Josh." Tyler was frustrated and desperate, clinging to him for dear life. "I love you."

"I love you so-" He choked a little. "much Tyler, I'm sorry."

Tyler kissed him, dripping tears down Josh's cheeks that fell off his chin and mingled with the blood seeping all over his chest. Tyler felt Josh's lips go limp against and he pulled him tighter but he knew it was too late, he'd slipped away. Tyler pulled away as the ringing in his ears grew deafening. He held on for another minute before paramedics were rushing into the room, attempting to revive him.

Josh had lost too much blood; he'd gone so far away that not even Tyler could reach him anymore. Tyler hunched over his body, screaming. He still felt warm, Tyler could still feel his skin and see those perfect freckles on his face but he was gone. The stars in the sky had gone out, there were no more constellations, no more glints of hope shining in the moonlight, everything was a vast soul-sucking blackness draining his heart.

Tyler screamed and fought as the monitors tried to drag him off the body so that the paramedics could work but they all knew it was too late. With a regretful expression, they began to pick up the body and place it on a gurney. Dr. Long helped them to take the body away, but Tyler tried to hang on. Holding onto his hand. The monitors held on tightly to Tyler to stop him from collapsing as he screamed and sobbed some more. Josh's hand was torn for his own as the body was carted away.

"Josh." Tyler called out, his voice cracked. He fought against the monitor's grip, crying out as he ripped open his stitches. He didn't even care, the pain in his chest was infinitely worse than a few ripped stitches. He tried to chase after Josh's body but more people restrained him. He screamed before collapsing, his whole body going limp, the monitors tried their best catch him.

"It should've been me!" He screamed repeatedly as they attempted to calm him down. Nothing would calm him however; he had lost the only thing he stood to lose. The only purpose he had in life was gone and he wasn't sure if he even wanted to find a new one.

After a while a doctor sedated Tyler, taking him to the doctor's office to sleep off the trauma. While he was out someone re-stitched his stomach, and checked him over for other injuries.

When he awoke, he was checked for symptoms of shock and continuously fussed over.

He felt as though he was being watched like a hawk, everyone afraid of what he would do next, like a ticking time bomb. Instead, however, he simply stared blankly into space everything numb and colourless.

There was a brief moment where all attention was towards the doctor. The group of adults crowding around Tyler's medical file, clearly discussing what to do next with him.

He took the opportunity while they weren't paying attention to pull something off the counter and tuck it inside the waistband of his jeans. Even if he was patted down they were unlikely to feel it.

He waited until he was escorted back to his room, someone locked the door behind him and he was told to sleep.

He spat out the sleeping pills he'd pretended to swallow and flushed them down the toilet. He didn't look in the mirror he couldn't bear to see how broken he knew he looked.

When he was sure he wouldn't be disturbed he pulled the scalpel from where it was hidden. He carefully removed his hoodie and cut his bandages off with the instrument, freeing his skin.

He lay on his bed, in just his boxers, taking a deep breath and letting a single tear fall from his eye before he raised the cold metal instrument to his skin.

His eyes fluttered as he felt himself being dragged from reality by inking tar-like arms. He heard muffled cries for help through the thick waters he was slowly submerging himself in.

"Tyler what have you done?!" Dr. Kemp screamed in horror, shaking hands pulling at him. She had just come to check on him before lights out.

Her words echoed around his skull he heard them in his mother's voice once again. His vision tunnelled and everything went white and he saw a face. He could've sworn it was an angel but he had brown curly hair and piercing brown eyes, his laugh made Tyler's whole body feel light and with a hint of a smile on Tyler's lips he exhaled; everything faded to black...

THE END.