Lifeline {joshler}

twenty three

tw: should be okay. There are only two chapters left now. :(

🌱

Tyler wasn't allowed to be released from the hospital for another three days due to the need for a psychiatrist to be called in the speak to him. He was so itching to get out of the hospital that he almost ripped his stitches as he flung himself out of the bed. He winced as the nurse helping him gave him a stern look.

Tyler's mother helped him to pack the small bag of things she had brought for him. She stopped folding clothes to sit on the edge of the hospital bed.

"Tyler, we need to talk before you go back." She sighed.

Tyler immediately stopped packing his things to sit on the edge of the bed beside her.

After a small silence, she wrapped her arm around her son. With a deep breath, she spoke. "Perhaps it's a good idea to think about a different program?"

Tyler squeezed his eyes shut as if that would will the situation away. "No."

"Tyler, listen to me." His mother shifted around so she was crouched in front of him, looking him directly in the eyes. Her eyes were glossy as though tears were preparing to spill. "I nearly lost you twice and honestly, I really don't know what to do anymore, Tyler. I'm scared. I'm your mother and I'm supposed to know what's wrong and how to fix it and I don't, I can't and that terrifies me. I want you to come home, to play basketball with Zack until dinner time, to yell at Maddie for hogging the bathroom, to play with Jay like you used to. I want you to be part of this family again."

Tyler realised she was crying now, he was too. He'd been so selfish.

"Okay." He said weakly.

"Okay?" His mother searched his eyes for what that meant.

"I want to come home mom; I want that so badly." He finally admitted. "But I don't want to go to Otterbein, I don't want to leave..." Tyler's croaky voice trailed off.

"Josh?" His mother supplied, she rubbed her hands down his sides comfortingly. "I've seen the way he looks at you when you're not looking." She shrugged as he stared dumbfounded. His mother gave a light laugh, the first he'd heard from her in the longest time.

"So I was a little hesitant at first, but Tyler, honey, I nearly lost you twice and I honestly cannot go through that again, ever. I love you so much, no matter who you love, even if it is boys with bright hair you met in a mental health facility."

Tyler choked out a happy sob, bringing his hand up to wipe his nose. His mother pulled him tightly into his chest stroking his hair and shushing him quietly.

"I think I want to come home now." Tyler mumbled into her shoulder.

"Okay." His mother replied softly, kissing his forehead. "I'll sort it." She promised before going back to helping him pack.

Meanwhile Josh was currently sat in his therapy session, worrying at his lip as he tried not to think about Tyler.

"Josh, Tyler is back today, how does that make you feel?" Dr. Long asked as she twirled her pen in her hand. Josh sighed.

"Happy, I guess?" Josh replied unsure of what to say.

"You care about him?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Of course." Josh replied instantly not liking the implication that there was doubt he might not.

"Look Josh, there's something I need to tell you." His therapist sat up straighter in her chair, Josh mirrored her action on reflex. He could feel his heart thumping in his chest, rattling his ribcage.

"Okay?" He pressed on hesitantly.

"Tyler," She hesitated with a shaky breath. "It seems like that in a few weeks, Tyler will be leaving here." Josh went completely numb. "Most likely to a more intensive program but his family is considering their options and what's best for Tyler."

The doctor reached out for Josh's hand but he ripped it away, unable to look at her, his whole world rapidly spinning out of control. How was he going to be okay if what happened to Ruby happened to Tyler, and that had been his fault too. He was bad for everyone, they would've been better off without him, how could be so evil.

Josh balled his shaking fists as he tried to push down the panic attack in favour of an eerie calmness that spread through his chest.

Before Tyler could even fully pass through the door of the facility he was being rushed through the pat down and taken to his therapy session.

"Welcome back Tyler." Dr. Kemp smiled.

Tyler simply nodded weakly, a little disorientated from not having a chance to even catch his breath upon returning.

"I spoke with your mother and she's began filling out the paperwork. You'll most likely be released in just over two weeks, so we can see if the new medication you were given works. We don't want to send you home before then; any kinds of changes or stress will make the meds harder to adjust to."

Tyler nodded understandingly eyes fixed out the window and the drizzle that was now coating the window frame. He wanted as much time with Josh as he could get, before the system made it hard for him to get constant access.

"So, can we talk about what happened?" Dr. Kemp pushed on, Tyler sighed heavily before turning his gaze back to Dr. Kemp.

He was going to do this; he was going to pull himself together and get strong and save himself. He was tired of hurting himself and even more tired of hurting everyone around him. He was ready to fight for once, and he was going to win. Most importantly he was going to win so he could help Josh win too.

He nodded determinedly and sat up a bit straighter. "Okay..."