Depths of my mind

7/2/17

"That stuff is poison to me." He said shaking his head. The other drank the dark liquid and shrugged. "I think for most people it is." The blonde headed admitted. The brunette shook his head and laughed knowing he too was guilty of taking part in it at other times in his life.

The night went on, as the brunette watched quietly. Secretly he hoped he would have a chance to write a wrong he had made when he was young and admittedly stupid. Deep down he knew how he felt but had buried it in fear that if it went further, their friendship would end and given they worked together, it would also be the end of their jobs.

The blonde threw back more of the burning liquid as the night progressed. After all he was young and no one could stop him. Though his eyes never truly left the brunette, who was having fun but in a less inhibited fashion. The last they shared was one of love and happiness with a fair amount of hatred through the years, but both of them attributed the hatred to keeping them friends as long as they had been. That and the fact they shared everything with each other, never holding back anything really. The blonde had a deep love for his counterpart but a relationship lost with time had already proven they were better off as friends, or at least that's what he told himself. His love for the other had never died, even all theses years later (not to mention other relationships). What did hold him back was the fear of loosing him entirely and permanently. They had bouts of not speaking to each other for half of a year and he couldn't bare doing that now, especially since their jobs depended on them being close.

As the night went on and others started to disappear from the gathering, the pair sat alone as they usually did. The younger of the pair, the brunette broke the silence first. "I made a mistake." He said quietly. The older turned to him, worried. "Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?" The younger shook his head. "I let you go." He admitted, just above a whisper. "I'm still right here." The older said, embracing the small brunette. "And I still love you." He said, so quietly the younger nearly missed it. He turned his head up and started into the blondes blue eyes and spoke. "I love you too, and I was wrong. I'd rather be with you in that way then be friends. I was just young and stupid." The older smiled and hugged the younger tighter and replied, "you weren't stupid, you made the best decision for you at the time and your doing the same thing now. Even if it doesn't work out again, we will always be friends."