Ramblings of the Soul (✅)

Bereavement

You never came home, Jax, where did you go?
I've been here ever since, waiting alone.
I know what happened, but my mind rejects it.
How could you be here one second and gone the next?
It just doesn't make any damn sense.
You told me not to worry, you'll be back in a hurry, but when you did come back you weren't the same.
You kept your promise, but this wasn't what I wanted.
People call me crazy and tell me that I'm just grieving, but every single night you come to see me.
I can't see your face, but I can feel it's you, Jax.
You silently remain away observing me with your blank gaze that effortlessly stirs my emotions without delay.
I tried to reach out to you, I tried to coax you over, but all you ever did was stay in your corner.

Jax, don't you trust me?
Can't you hear me?
I don't care what you are now, just please, come near me.
I crave your touch, your smile, your embrace, especially your lips upon my face.

It's only ever been you and me, is this why you refuse to abandon me?
They told me you were blown to smithereens by extremists whose main goal was to spread terror across each sea.
This was your idea, I agree, but please don't punish yourself because of me.
People die in war and I was prepared for that.

You're the bittersweet melody to our tragedy and I would sacrifice everything to let you stay, but your desperate expression every night is leading my sanity astray.
Would you be less upset if I joined you, my love?
Forever, we'd be in each others' arms to forget the agony of being apart.
However, unlike most in these sort of tales, I have a family that actually cares.
They have treated us with such respect, tender love, and affection since the day we both met.
Though two men are seen as sin, my family has never let the negativity of society in.
I love them dearly, but I've locked them out.
I'm afraid to let them in to see your beautiful ebony that drives my heart wild and fuels my own overwhelming desire.

Am I selfish to keep you here where you don't belong?
What if the afterlife doesn't exist after all?
Will this be the last we meet?
Will our love story be able to continue?

Oh, Jaxton, my sweet, I believe your life is now complete.
I shall be okay, dear, I promise thee, just please, please, never forget me.

Do not be afraid for I shall find you again someday.
My heart is yours and yours is mine and with that our souls combine.
We may never be the same, but happiness has other names.
I bid you farewell, sweetheart, please pass on and remember that our love will forever live on.