Ramblings of the Soul (✅)

Daddy's Little Girl

Life used to be so simple.

I used to think that I was drowning in a life so overwhelming, but nothing compares to the reality now.
A world of dark colors and supperless nights make me crave Mom's nutritious nagging.
I would kill for a piece of fruit or even a pea, just to have my family back around me.
Mom left, but I couldn't stand to leave you, Dad.
I thought she loved you, but then again, our world really has come to an end.
I know in my heart that I should start believing you're dead, but how could I with you standing right in front of me, chained to your bed?

Your eyes are blank, but they still see, even if they don't focus on me.
Your lips move, but there's snarls in place of words.
I expect you to reach out to embrace me, but all you ever do is try to scrape me with nails resembling yellowed fencing.

Dad, what happened to us?
What happened to the world around us?
I'm scared and I know I should leave or at least put you out of your misery, but I can't, my arms shake and quiver as I hold the sliver of metal meant to pierce your brain.
My spirit's drained, Dad.
I can't do it.

You've always been there for me.
I loved Mom too, but you were different.
You were the first man I loved and wanted to marry.
You were always there to carry me home after rough softball games.
You were my rock from the start, before I could even talk.
I don't need to remember that to, in fact, tell you my feelings, Dad.

It should've been me that took the bite that led us to this very night.
I've never seen you cry in my seventeen years of life, but that day my soul left with you.

There's no more tears to cry, my eyes as dry as the hottest of summers.
Summers where'd we laugh and play and you'd tell me you'd never leave my side.

Dad, I don't know what to do.
Please, speak to me.
I want you to lead the way.

Please, take me with you.
Take me away.
Take the blood that flows through my veins and the life that you gave me.
You can have it all, just please, don't really be gone.
I've had enough seeing you struggle and suffer.
I've been at your side since you've died, if you can really call it death at all.

Dad, I love you, I want you to remember that.
Whether you're in there or not, I want you to make this insanity stop.

That's right, just hold me tight and bring me along, wherever you are.
I'm not afraid, just take me away.
Take me away from this, I won't be missed when there's nobody left to care.
It's just me and you, Dad, don't be scared.

You're cold and your breath smells rotten, but I still haven't forgotten your scent and your silly southern accent.

I'm ready, Dad.
I'm not afraid.
It hurts, but the love we share is an unstoppable force that will not keep us apart any longer.

Our bond will forever grow stronger.