The smile that was ignored (KIMTAEHYUNGXBTS) (Completed)

Chapter 11

Jeon jung kook pov
We were having fun in the living room when I saw Taetae hyung at the stairs. He don't notice me looking at him.

He just stand there and with an amazing speed go upstairs. What I can't forget was the face that he made. A weird emotion fill his face. He was hurt. By us.

I look around and all the members just laughing at hope hyung's joke. They don't seemed to notice Taetae hyung too.

Honestly when Taetae hyung run away that time when we mad at him, I was worried and I felt guilty. But other hyungs convinced me to not worried to much.

When he came back. He just look fine. Smiling to us. My anger filled me again. I was worried about him but he just fine and don't even remembered to tell us where did he go.

He even told a stranger, that doctor something bad about us. Thats why I decided to just ignore him. A weird thing is he keep smiling eventhough we ignore him.

He don't come out of the room too which is rare to see.After having so much fun it was already midnight when we go to our own room.

Somehow, that night, I can't sleep. This one feeling keep haunting me. Guilty. Taetae hyung's face keep appeared in my mind.

When I lay on the bed, I keep replaying the whole scene that I was with TaeTae hyung. After a while,Its clear now to me.

How he always smile eventhough we are ignoring him. I see all of it now.
He was hiding something behind his smile.

I should know it earlier. Instead of asking I just make it worst. Why am I'm so blind to see the hurt and pain behind his smile?! I just make it worse!

Why did our family that always filled with happiness before be like...this?

I just too consumed in my feeling to even realize Taetae hyung was there. What is he doing here? What should I do?

I just pretend to sleep and faced my back to him. He will never noticed me awake and he will leave right? I'm too guilty to faced him now.

"Kookie, are you sleeping?" he asked with whispered. I don't know why but his voice sound really weak. This is the first time I heard his voice after he met with Bang pd nim. He just replied us with a smile.

"Kookie-ah.. I'm not supposed to tell you this. I'm should keep it hidden but I need someone to hear me out. I know you are not going to hear this because you are sleeping." He pause and chuckle.

"I'm just want to tell someone. I guess. I've always been afraid of losing people I love, Sometime I even wonder if there is anyone out there afraid of losing me." He said. I can sense the sadness in it. Why he said something like that?

"I'm afraid to be lonely. I'm trying to be happy. But its not working like that. Since I found you guys, I immediately felt loved. You guys are like my second family. But I have to ruin it by being annoying. I'm sorry kookie-ah, for not being what you wanted me to be."He said and stopped for a moment. My heart break at that. Its our fault not him.

"That one day, when you guys mad at me because I want to eat outside, I just want to be together with you guys. I'm sorry for being noisy. I thought the next day, everything will be alright.B-but..." With that he was crying with a silent sobbed. I don't know what to do. Should I wake up? I make a move to wake up but stop by his voice.

"I'm dying Kookie-ah. I don't have much time. I want to be like before. I want us to be happy together just like before. Is it so hard to be granted? I'm not so strong anymore. When I thought I will be lonely, Seojin hyung come to me. Give me a hand, give me a hug that I need that time. He told me I'm strong. But I know I'm not really strong like what people said." He said fully crying now. What did he mean by he is dying?! This is serious.

"When I start doing my treatment later, my body will be weak. I'm afraid I can't do anything with you guys anymore. Please forgive me... Please.. For the last time..." He said. I can't do this anymore.

I look behind me and saw Taetae hyung hugging his knee close to his chest. That sight broke me.A pair of tears flow down my face and it continue to flow like a river now.

"H-hyung. Its our fault. I'm sorry hyung. Please don't cry."
I sobbed while hugging him. He look shocked at first but the he look at me while saying.

"S-since when you are awake?" His voice cracked because of his crying.

"Since start. H-hyung, please tell me what do you mean by you are dying? You are still young." I said still hugging him. His body started to be tense.

"I-I have a tumor kookie-ah. Brain tumor." He said slowly. But the impact was not really slow. I was really shocked that I froze for a good minute.

"No, no it can't be. You are so healthy hyung." my sobbed are getting louder.
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Kim Taehyung p.o.v
I looked at our maknae that was struggle to believe that I have tumor. I never want them to know but because of my stupid mistake he need to know. I just add on his stress.

"Kookie-ah, kookie? Look at me. I'm fine. I will survive." He look at me like I will dissapear anytime.

"Promise me hyung, you will survive and you will fight until the end?" He ask me with his doe eyes. He look so cute though.

"I will. I'm promise."
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[Taehyung's note book]
Things to do before I go...
1) Go to a beautiful place with my members and have a vacation there.
2)Go to a field trip with Seojin hyung.
3) meet my family again.
4) Spend my time with ARMYs in the fanmeeting.
5) Eat outside with the members.
6) buy a gifts to all the members.
7) Gather everyone that I love and make a party😆
8) Make the members smile everyday.
9)Spend my times with my family sometime.
10) Close my eyes beside all the people that I love....
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Author note.
As promise... 1 hour after the last chapter. Sorry for updating tooooo much..Hahahah..btw Thanks for your times 🙇🙇

Feel free to correct my mistakes.Don't forget to vote and tell me what you think about this book.