BTS Oneshots

Yoongi ~ Loses you to suicide (PART ONE)

You sat on the bed, feeling empty, feeling numb. You felt like no one was there for you anymore, no one at all. Surprisingly, not even bangtan. You said you'd take a nap about thirty minutes ago but all you've been doing is staring at the floor, remembering your past, remembering the hate, laughing at how pathetic you are.
You remember one year ago exactly, you swore to yourself that you'd never ever let the hate get to you as bad it as did, you ended up in hospital due to a suicide attempt. Right now, you wouldn't mind if the attempt, worked.

Tears stung your eyes just at the thought, you remember Yoongi being there for you day and night, he'd always ask if you were okay when you didn't act like yourself. He never left your side if he was worried that you'd hurt yourself but Yoongi didn't have to. He chose to. "I'm sorry..." You said, a tear slipping down your face, "I am so very sorry."

You stood up and looked in the drawers for a notebook and a pen, and that is exactly what you found. Tears were streaming now, nothing could stop them.

Dear Bangtan,

I would just like to say that none of this is your fault, absolutely none of it. So please, I'm begging you, do not feel bad. Don't feel sad. Just move on, it's like I never even existed. Forget about me, it's for your own good.

You thought I was getting better didn't you? I'm sorry but.. I wasn't not at all. I couldn't stop remembering my past, the abuse, the bullying. The self harm.. all of it. Heck, I'm still getting hate now , it's pathetic but it's taking so much of a toll on me.
I didn't jump because I wanted to hurt any of you, I didn't jump because I wanted to do what they were telling me to. I jumped because I, myself, needed to. I needed to end this pain that doesn't end, I needed to stop making you guys worry, I need to stop.

I just need to stop , which is exactly what I'm doing.

Yoongi... I am so so sorry , I love you and I will always love you, please don't make the same mistake as I did. Don't keep everything on the inside.

Namjoon, you're like an older brother to me, I'm sorry to leave like this but it's the best for you and for me, stay safe sweetheart.

Hoseok... don't stop smiling, don't stop laughing. Don't change at all. Don't keep everything inside. It's not good.

JK ... I have nothing to say other than I'm sorry for everything I've ever done

Taehyung.. your my V mkay? You always will be

Seokjin, baby boy please stay the way you are now, do not let me ruin your mood

Jimin , thank you for everything, I love you

I love you all but this is goodbye,
       Y/N

You let out a tiny sob when you opened the door. You slowly walked downstairs and into the kitchen, placing the note on the counter. Yoongi raised an eyebrow as he read the first paragraph, by the end of that, you were already on your way to the roof.

"Y/N? Stop!" You ignored his voice and continued to walk to your own death. "Please! I'm begging you!"

"No... not this time, I'm not falling for life's stupid games. Not again." You wiped away a tear, walking to the edge and looking over.

"Y/N.. why? Why do you think that this is a solution...?" Yoongi asked, you turned around and held back a cry. His expression was more than just hurt, it was true pain. His bright eyes were now dull, it was sad.

"I'm in too much pain... I don't want to fight this stupid fight anymore. I'm losing it." You took a small step backwards, you were on the very edge now. Yoongi rushed towards you and pulled you forwards, "Let go! Let fucking go of me! Let go!" You screamed, you shoved him off of you.