Three Is A Crowd

Chapter 14: Queen of the Pride

"You'll never amount to anything."

Her mother's words play repeatedly inside her head that at some point during her drive back to campus, she almost believes it herself.

"You pick up a hobby, and for a while you believe it's your passion, but then you get bored and jump to your next distraction. You don't finish anything, Lauren, how can you expect me to respect you as an adult if you can't get your priorities straight? You're potentially good at everything, but in the end, you're nothing."

Lauren, through the years, has learned to keep her emotions in check, she's been desensitized to her parents' opinions about her most of the time, but damn, she's just human. Sometimes, things could still affect her deeply. Sometimes, words cut deeper than a sword, leaving a person with a gaping wound in the chest, bloodless yet equally fatal; one may kill your body, but the other could annihilate your soul.

She may not look like it, but hearing people, who are supposedly the ones who should accept and support her no matter what, degrade what she stands for and think that who she is isn't enough, truly kills her inside.

Maybe her mother is right, she's a failure and she's bound to disappoint everybody because she's a spoiled fuck up.

Her eyes burn from unshed tears trying to escape as she walks inside Lylas Hall. She won't let it, though. She's better than this. She's not a sap. All she needs is to get her ass back to the dorm room before she does anything stupid in front of random students meandering about in the hallways.

"Stop being selfish, Lauren, and think about people other than yourself for once. You're nobody without your family, don't forget that."

What does her mother think she's doing, anyway? She's back in college, isn't she? She's wasting her time doing shit she doesn't want, just so she'll have the diploma to do even more shit she'd rather not do. Well, okay sure, maybe she's doing it for her trust fund, but still, she's doing it, that's the point. She's here, still trying to please her family despite them being undeserving of her efforts. She may not enjoy it, and may sulk about it every chance she gets, but she's still here. Why can't her mother appreciate that?

How can one weekend destroy her? No, wait, how can one conversation kill her soul, which is barely thriving as it is?

She doesn't even want to recall how she fought with Clara, as they always do whenever the subject of Lauren taking over the company -- a responsibility she most definitely didn't ask for. Lauren couldn't even count the number of times she has been called "ungrateful"; and she might have called her mother a "manipulative bitch", which of course, resulted into another round of "Let's remind Lauren how much of a disappointment she is" -- a game that only her mother excels and wins at.

It was brutal, to say the least. Clara is a fucking heartless bitch who thinks her children are nothing but pawns to her own game of chess; an investment that she could collect the profits from anytime she wants. She's her property. Lauren obviously has no say about her own life.

The funny thing is, all that explosive fight started simply because Lauren mentioned that she wanted to attend a writing workshop by a well-known author she admires. It was just casual conversation; small talk at the dinner table. Lauren didn't think it could be so offensive to her mother, because she was simply sharing something she's passionate about to her siblings. Clara, of course, got mad and told her to get her ass out of her silly little la la land, and focus on her studies, which should be her priority, instead of wasting her time on things that will get her nowhere. Lauren got angry because why does her mother always has something bad to say about anything she does that doesn't even directly benefit her legacy. Why is she so bothered when it's not even gonna affect Lauren's school work?