Three Is A Crowd

Chapter 33: Never Be The Same

It just so happens that the minute Lauren has decided to accept the sad fact that Camila didn't choose her, and let go of the hurt she felt when she was stood up at the airport, Camila, on the other hand, has begun to pine for Lauren's presence, ironically because of her absence.

It's like a total shift of dynamics, where Lauren used to be the one adjusting to Camila's every moves because she's hyper aware of her presence, and she craves for it; she wants what she doesn't have. Now, Camila misses what she used to have and is now glaringly gone. It doesn't even have to mean that she's suddenly in love with Lauren (although any random onlooker would easily assume she is possibly infatuated).

No, it's just one of those circumstances when a person is so used to another person bugging her and showering her with attention, and when all of that suddenly stops, the person wonders what has happened. Maybe it's plain vanity (is she ugly now? Is something wrong with her? Why doesn't she like her anymore?), maybe Camila is indeed harboring feelings for Lauren which she couldn't understand, or maybe she just misses the companionship she has been used to these past months.

And so, a paradigm shift happens, where Camila is now the one trying to catch Lauren's attention, or wondering where she is or what she's thinking, and basically just observing her every chance she gets.

It's not like she's not into Shawn anymore, and that she likes Lauren more. No, it's more of a nagging curiosity most humans experience at some point in their lives when someone who used to pursue them is now suddenly ignoring them. There's a deep desire inside of people that craves for that attention, and some wouldn't even realize it, but it's there lurking. Whether it's reciprocal attraction or not, it makes people feel special.

But, now, unfortunately for Camila, Lauren seems to be back to normal. So normal that she can almost sense the old Lauren begging to come out; the old sarcastic Lauren, the old flirty Lauren, the old snappy Lauren who ignores Camila most of the time.

To be fair, she's not that bad, though. She's not being a jerk, at least not always, but Camila can sense the distance even when they're pretty much five feet away from each other, and that's even worse when Lauren's being rude or bitchy.

She's back to her old proclivities again, and Camila is slightly annoyed by it. Not for the reasons that Dinah insists upon (she's not fucking jealous!) but because Lauren keeps coming in so late at night, either drunk out of her mind, or with new hickeys on her neck, or worse, she brings her gal pals or boy toys in the room and they blatantly make out in front of Camila. It's messing with Camila's beauty sleep and study time.

At least, she's not like doing it in front of her, and Camila has never walked in on Lauren doing the nasty with anyone (unlike before, cringe!), so Camila is thankful for that. Although she makes sure to hide Mr. Snuggles every time she goes out of the room, just to keep him from being traumatized. God knows he's seen enough to last him three lifetimes.

Thankfully, she and Lauren has fallen into this kind of relationship where they co-exist peacefully (fucking define peacefully) -- although, she has noticed that Lauren is starting to do her little pranks again (nothing of that face vandalism sort, thank god!), but that's better than being ignored. And it's not like Camila doesn't retaliate every now and then. So, it's a good give and take relationship.

It's definitely better than nothing.

Lauren is the queen of closure, Camila has noticed, because given how both of them are acting now one would think that it has always been Camila who's pining over Lauren. Girly got mad skills, that's for sure. She's definitely serious when she said she's letting go and moving on.