Amnesia (Camren)

Chapter Thirteen

Lauren

I've been away from the group for two weeks. Two weeks since I ran away, since I walked out and talked to the girls. Though they did send various messages a day, I ignored all of them. I couldn't do this. I couldn't continue to be part of it and pretend everything was okay when it wasn't.

So I was hiding out. No one knew of the location except for management. I had to tell them of the break I needed. They agreed to it reluctantly, but nonetheless they agreed to allow me a month off before we would go on tour.

Tour. It was what I dreaded the most. I couldn't imagine being on tour with them and pretend that nothing had happened. But I also couldn't talk to them. I couldn't force myself to care about anything but myself. I needed to put myself first. It was what I should have done in the first place. I should have just listened to my mom and my dad. They were right. They were always right.

"Lauren, lunch is ready!" My mom yelled up the stairs.

When it all got tough, the one place I knew I could always count on and I had not forgotten was home and family. So I ran back home to Miami, where I knew I could be me and not have to wonder about everything I was missing.

They wouldn't have the answers even if I tried to ask. They didn't know as much as the girls knew. They knew the basics of me going to X Factor to becoming part of a pretty well known girl group today. That was it.

So currently, my life was as peachy as it was going to get. Which relieved some of the pressure I had building up inside of me, but I didn't know the whole truth yet. And I knew at one point, I would need to know the truth--the complete truth.

"Thanks mom." I slid into a chair at the breakfast table after giving my mom a kiss on the cheek.

"Eat before it gets cold." She gestured to the plate in front of me, which was filled with all sorts of Cuban food. I loved her cooking. It was the best.

I took a couple of bites before I started talking to her. We had small random conversations that made me forget about this whole disaster I called my life. The more time I spent here, the less stressed I was feeling over all of this. I think I made the best choice deciding to come home after that whole thing with Camila.

Camila.

She was the only one who had not messaged me or attempted to call me. I checked daily hoping she would, but I had fucked that up; really fucked it up big time.

I never should have spoken to her like that or said the things I did. It tore me apart after I had enough time to think about my words and actions, but my pride was too much to go back and apologize. I didn't want to seem weak by making the first step. Although I was the cause for her misery and mine, I couldn't bring myself to make the first move to call or text her.

"What are you doing today honey?"

"Hmm. I don't know. I figured I would just lounge around the house."

I really hadn't done much in the last week. I'd been hiding away in my parent's house to avoid any fans or the possibility of paparazzi lurking about while walking around town.

Management had put out a statement about how I was fine, but I was taking a small break due to personal reasons.

Of course that had made Twitter blow up and not to mention any other social media I had. The fans were sadden over the news but they also wished I was okay and that they wished me the best. It was sweet and I had responded to a few. Mainly I tried to stay away from it so I wouldn't get wrapped up in what was happening. It was better if I did. Less for me to deal with.