The Fuckgirls' Secret

Page|14: This was the first time I ever kissed a guy.

"Oh, sorry. I don't remember. But you..look so..familiar." I answered and he looked sad.

"So, what are you doing here alone?"

"I'm angry, cause I saw Jake kissing someone." How could I be telling him what I was supposed to be keeping?

"What? That bastard." He stood and I think I knew what he's up to. I pressed my arms on both of his shoulders.

"I think, I needed to cry. I can't hold this any longer. Can you tell me where the bathroom is?" I said in a flat tone. Hoping that he won't notice my sarcasm. I'm really hurt but I don't want anyone to know it. I wanted to avoid this guy, for he could be one of those guys who will give Jake information. And I put my shoes in. I struggled pulling the lace, so I just stopped wearing it and carried my shoes.

"Come on."

"Wait, yo-you are com-ing?" I hiccupped at the wrong time.

"And you're drunk."

He offered his hand and I took it without hesitating. He led me through different sweaty bodies on our way. We went upstairs. It's dark in here and I can't see anything except I felt the hand entwined with mine.

He led me to a door at the end of a-I think was a hallway.

"Get in." He said and I went inside. That's when I only realized that I was alone with a stranger. He led me to his bedroom. How could I be so dumb? Thoughts of what he would do to me was flooding my mind. I am dead.

"You can cry now." He said.

"What? No. I needed to go. Please don't kill me."

"What? Who said I was going to kill you? You are drunk. You are hurt. You need privacy. Plus you can spill things with me..I promise to keep my mouth shut."

"What?" I said I tears went rolling down my cheeks. Because of fear and not because of what Jake did. Well, some of it was.because of Jake, but that was because I felt betrayed because we made a deal. And I thought he was being serious about it, but no, he wasn't. It was all going smoothly. "Okay, it was pathetic that I am crying. Because as far as I remember, nothing's really going on with me and Jake. Then, I felt hurt when I saw him earlier with another girl." I sat on the huge bed, threw my boots on the ground.

"What? You and Jake---nothing's going on with you two?" He asked as he sat beside me. Oops! Shit! What was coming out of my mouth was unintended.

"Yeah..no..sort of? we just made a deal about being a couple for three months, for our own reasons." Maybe he knew. For fuck's sake he was Jake's friend. He may be one of those who insist to make a bet on me. "You already knew that, right?" I asked him.

"What reasons? And to answer your question, no. I didn't know about a bet." His voice was calm but it voiced possessiveness.

I didn't answer him.

"You didn't answer my question, Amy. What reasons, Amy." He growled. What's his problem.

"He said he made bets with his friends. To make me his girlfriend for 3 months then after that he is supposed to break my heart. He said his father's business was bankrupted. So they played bet because he needed money."

"What? Are you serious? Because Jake's dad was in Europe doing business. He traveled around countries. If you call that bankrupted." What? Does that mean, Jake lied to me? Why? Of course it's part of the bet I'm sure. This was unexpected. I thoughy Jake was not what he was, but I was so wrong about that. I'm really starting to like him as a friend.

"I didn't know. I know the way you look at me, you pity me. You pity my stupidness. I fell for nothing." and I started crying. I hated how my feelings escalated fastly will crash down suddenly in one blink.

"I don't feel pity." He said and cold hands started to cover me. He was so cold. Just what I needed. I embraced him too. "You didn't fell for nothing. You fell, but I'll be the one to catch you. If that's alright."

I looked at his blue eyes and saw sincerity. How did see it? I didn't know. He was a stranger, but I feel comfortable with him. Why? But the only thing I knew was that I placed my lips on his. He tasted like mint, peppermint and beer.

This was the first time I ever kissed a guy. His mouth on mine felt perfectly fine. His taste, his smell. Everything. I put my hands on his hair not breaking our kiss.

How could I told him our secret. And how could he say those things to me as if he knew me. I felt relieved for now. Well, how about tomorrow, when I wake up?

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