All Your Little Things: A Niall Horan/Matthew Espinosa Fanfiction

Chapter 18: Get out, Get out, Get out of my head!!

The guys kept hugging me and we decided to go and watch a movie.

We all sat there (Lou, Liam, Kaylee and Me) very silently.

We didn't really talk that much, because if they said something, I would burst into tears.

I hate this.

Niall keeps doing this to me! I don't think I can be anything with him. That means definitely not girlfriend, and not friends.

I hope he realized he lost someone worth while.

I know I was never the best girlfriend, but I know I didn't suck. I cared, helped, and believed every boyfriend I have ever have.

To sum it up, I only had a few boyfriends.

I really don't like talking about 2 of them.

The first one in high school was abusive.

The second one, he gave a shit. He cared for me. We had a stupid argument, and we broke up. Which was a terrible mistake. He was like my best friend after that though.

And the last one, he was just like the second one, but after about 6 months of dating, I found out he was cheating on me.

I sworn to not have another boyfriend until I was emotionally stable, and when I met Niall, I certainly was not.

It's like inside I want to scream and cry and hate myself. But on the outside I smile, like everything is ok. I hate how my emotions work.

I can still remember the first time I met Niall. I was so dumb.

I should've known he was going to do something. Just because he's a pop star, doesn't mean he can play girls like it's Monopoly.

I know, I am no model, and I am definitely not the prettiest peach. But I think that I am beautiful on the inside.

Boys just pay attention to the outside stuff and pretend to care about the inside. But, after just you and the outside, you need to know the inside. It ticked me off that most guys play like that.

I hate this.

I mentioned it already?

Good.

Well, I am regretting my decision.

Liam was here for me. I told him I love Niall, and he still came to my rescue.

Niall was with another girl and probably forgot about me by now.

I honestly never want to see him, or look at him again.

~

After hugging and crying everywhere, I forced the guys to leave.

I know I wanted them to stay, but they needed to go. It was really dark outside.

I really hate how I am so obvious to guys.

I don't want to think about it.

I have work tomorrow.

I work at a music store. Which is fun because there are less than 50 costumers every day, so most of the time we just play piano and teach some little kids some songs.

I decided to sleep.

The next morning I got up at 7 and decided to wear a white polo and some leggings and my red Toms.

I walked outside to my car, and drove to work.

Thank golly that Sadie was there, I would have died working here alone all day.