Pathfinder

Part 2 - 27

TWENTY SEVEN—LEXI

"So you spent the night with Brody Vincent and he's already picking you up in an hour for a date?" Lucas asked, as I paced the living room. I'd debated about what to wear for this date and prayed I chose appropriately. Brody wouldn't tell me where we were going, so I chose a soft pink sundress and simple sandals.

"Yes, I spent the night with Brody and yes, we're going on a date. Hey, Lucas, I know you're my brother, but...I had sex for the first time last night." I blurted.

Lucas choked, "Uh, whoa, I wasn't expecting that. Ok, so...why are you telling me?"

"I mean...how do I know if I did it right?"

Lucas chuckled, but was still clearly uncomfortable having this conversation with his younger sister. He said, "Well, how did he act...afterward."

"Well, we fell asleep for a couple hours and then..." I blushed, before adding, "We did it again."

"Then you did fine. Trust me. Guys are simple. We're pretty easy to please, especially if we're getting some."

"Uh, ok, it's just that...I'm nervous because I'm totally inexperienced and Brody is the opposite. I just don't know how I measure up with anyone else he's been with." I admit, sadly.

"Lex, stop it. Those women don't measure up to you. You're the one with Brody's heart. I'm sure of it." Lucas said, kindly.

"He told me he loved me."

"See? Wait, did you say it back? Are you still in love with him? You haven't mentioned, but I'm assuming he explained what really happened six years ago."

I quickly explained what Lance had done. Lucas cursed and grew silent. I knew that he too was wondering how much of Lance's drinking problem and been stemmed from guilt. I sighed, "I didn't say it back, but yes, I still love him. He told his mother off this morning. He told her that he would marry me tomorrow if I wanted to and if she wasn't on board with that, then he'd cut her out of his life."

"Wow, well, it sounds like you have nothing to worry about. Unless that's not what you want? "

"I think it's what I want, but how do I know for sure? My feelings have been so mixed up where Brody is concerned. I don't know which way is up anymore." I suddenly felt like crying.

"Lexi, you don't have to decide today. You two just started talking things out. You're just getting reacquainted. I don't know if jumping right into bed was the way to start, but I guess you got all of that sexual tension out of the way at least. Just go on this date with him and see how things go. You may know as soon as you see him again. You may know after the date. Even if you still don't know what you want, by the end of the day, there is always tomorrow. You don't have to rush into anything. I'm pretty sure Brody will be content to go at your speed." Lucas, sounding like the smart big brother he was.

I gave him a watery smiled, before burying my face against his chest, "I love you, Lucas. Thanks for the good advice."

A knock at the door told me that Brody had arrived. I took a deep breath and answered the door, but frowned when I felt Lucas at my back. Before I could say anything, Lucas growled, "So, Vincent, I hear you took my baby sister's virginity."

"Lucas!" I screeched.

Brody's eyes widened, but he recovered quickly, saying, "Uh, yes, I did. I didn't force her, if that's what you're implying."

Lucas snorted, "I know you didn't force her, asshole, I'm just making sure that you realize the gift that she gave you. After all this time, she still waited for you. Think about that, before you do something stupid and break her heart all over again, because I promise you won't survive if you do it again. I'll bury you where nobody will find you."

Brody nodded, but said, jaw clenched, "Noted."

"Ok, well, this has been fun. Don't wait up, big brother, I might not come home tonight." I tell him, daring him to tell me I couldn't stay out all night.

Lucas smiled and said, "Love you, Lexi." Then he shut the door, leaving Brody and I alone on the front porch.

Brody cleared his throat, as he rubbed the back of his neck, and gave me a crocked grin. "So...do you always talk to your brother about intimate details?"

"No! I just...had a question about...it and I didn't have anyone else to ask. I should have just waited for Leslie and asked her, but I've been driving myself nuts about it." I grumbled as we headed for Brody's car.

"It wasn't something you could have asked me?" Brody prodded, once he was behind the wheel. He had turned in his seat, to look at me, clearly not planning on starting the car any time soon.

I blushed, "Um, no."

He grinned, "What did you ask him?"

I shook my head, "I'm not telling you."

"Oh come on." He teased.

"Brody, stop." I pleaded.

He lost his humor, "It wasn't...you didn't...I didn't hurt you, did I? I mean, I know it can be painful for the first time, but I tried to be as gentle as possible and you seemed eager to do it again, so I thought—"

"I asked him how I would know if I was good at it!" I blurted, practically yelling.

Brody blinked at me, clearly shocked, "You didn't know if you were good at it? Christ, Lexi, you almost killed me it was so good. It's never been like that for me before and I think it's because I'm in love with you. Every other hook up, I've had, meant nothing and was emotionless. You're...I know we've only just started hanging out again and I hope you'll want to continue. I want you to know I don't expect anything from you. If you don't want to be intimate with me again until you're more comfortable around me or until you can...maybe...hopefully...return my feelings, then I'm fine with that. Whatever you want to do, just be open with me about it."

"Brody?" I whispered.

"Yea?"

"I love you too." I admitted and his eyes widened. I smiled, telling him, "I never stopped loving you. Even when I thought you cheated on me, I told myself that I needed to forget about you, but my heart didn't agree."

"So, does this mean we can try this again? I promise I will never do such a boneheaded thing again. I'll spend the rest of my life making you happy, if you'll let me. I don't know what kind of future I can offer you, because I don't really know what I'll end up doing with my life now."

With a deep breath, I took the plunge and said, "Yes, I want to try this again. I want to be with you. I only existed while we were apart. I wasn't living. I want to live again and I have to do that with you. It's like you and I are puzzle pieces and we only fit with each other."

Brody sucked in his breath, before pulling me across the seat. Right there, in my brother's driveway, we made-out like teenagers. When things began to heat up and we both knew we should stop, Brody lifted his head and said, "I know I'm rushing things, but let's go inside and get your things. I want you to move in with me."

I blinked and jumped over the ledge, nodding, "Ok."

Brody grinned, kissed me once more, and then we went inside to begin the process of intertwining our lives together, once again. It felt right and I wasn't going to question if it was the smart thing to do. My big brother had told me to see how things went tonight and roll with whatever felt right. Well, I was doing that, even if it meant putting my heart right back on my sleeve.