infinity kiss

blunt

how blunt can I be?
I'm a horrible person.

do I deserve to be called that?
no I'm a horrible thing.

I say how much love can be put into the world, how easy it is to give and receive, but I can never follow the same path I tell.

the path I follow is the one with the dying trees.
it's the one in movies from the option of two, where one's sunny and the other blue.

the path I follow is the one with echo's of sobs and cries from unknown things. it's the on with the flowers dying from lack of self-care.

the path I follow is the one full of despair. it's the one people don't even dare.

how common it is to find myself down this stupid path.

how common it is to disappoint my family and friends, my love and myself.

to never be there for them whenever they need me, I believe is how it is, when they're always there for me.

how dumb my brain and heart are for thinking one day I'd make some sort of change.

how dumb I was to think that these tears would be rare like the old times.

how dumb I am to believe that somehow, someway I can make others happy because that's what I feed on.

I feed on their happiness, and how unhealthy is that?

but how common do I follow my own path I tell, not at all.

so I'll pick up the dying sticks and plant my sluggish feet along the bricks.

and I'll cry with the echo's that sob and just like the flowers forget about self-care.

and I'll give up on the love and be the blue that's suck in the air like pollution over the sun.

and I'll let my self be full of despair, while others give up trying and don't even dare.

I'll never compare to happiness.
and I'll cry because I'll never be there...

here's my bluntness: I want to give up