Way Wedding

Epilouge; Everything I Ever Wanted.

Loading the last box into the car I looked over at my son. Feeling as thought all of the 18 years of his life had sped before my eyes until this moment. I tried to think of something to say to the man that stood before me. Taking the good parts of Jamia and I, his girlfriend blowing up his phone that was already plugged into the radio of my old white jeep. I felt myself yearning to remember the way it felt to hold him in my arms. Gerard came around the corner with a gift bag a smile etched on his face excited for the world of college that our son was going to get to experience. As he handed it to Miles they shared one of their looks that meant the world to them, but I could never fully figure out. Unwrapping the present he pulled out a Smiths vinyl and a bundle of restaurant gift cards. The joy crossing his face the way I had seen it done a million times over, but still never failed to make me smile myself.

"Thanks dad, this is awesome." Miles said wrapping Gerard in a hug before turning to me. "Oh cmon dad isnt mom supposed to be the one crying because I'm all grow up." He groaned wrapping me in his arms anyway as I tried to block away my tears. My arms locked around him so tightly you would have never thought I had done this three times already. First, sending Bandit off the art school in New York following in Gerard's footsteps. Much to Lindsay's dismay as she relentlessly tried to have a relationship with Bandit that had long been abandoned. I could still remember all of the frustration B went through trying to pick between what was expected of her, and what she wanted. As Gerard and I both tried to bite our tongues knowing making the choice for her and or influencing her wasn't healthy. Ultimately choosing the better of the choices she had gone off the New York, and was in her senior year of college. Then we had sent Lily off to study abroad in Italy, following her dreams to be a chef, and lastly Cherry off to college two hours away to pursue her teaching degree in special needs children. The empty nest syndrome was just hitting me making my arms tighten further around his lean body that kept trying to shake me off without hurting my feelings. "Hey when's mom coming with Rod?" He asked when I finally released him Gerard instantly coming to hold my shaking body with his arm.

"Around ten." I smiled looking down at my watch that read 9:55. My mind going over his packing list one more time mentally knowing better than to pester him with it for the millionth time as I took inventory of all of the stuff shoved in the back of the car. "Are you sure you don't want us to follow you up and help you move in?" I asked one more time hoping he'd change his mind. Gerard shaking his head over my hovering as he shut the back giving it a yank to make sure it was secure.

"He can do it, Frank. Our boys got this." I heard Jamia's voice remind me. As I turned to see her and Rod approaching with a small Manila envelope, and a first aide kit tucked up under her arm. Shoving it all in the passenger seat, she returned to wrap her arms around our son, her separation anxiety panting less against her newly wed bliss. A state that I still lived everyday even after almost 15 years of being married. "Okay there's a first side kit in the passenger seat, as well as an envelope containing our birth certificate, shot records, and social security card. Make sure to put it in a safe place. And, call as soon as you get there, and be safe baby okay." She reminded hugging him a small tear escaping her right eyes falling onto Mile's blue t-shirt. Patting her back they pulled apart as Miles humored us all in one last round of hugs. As I tried to nod the tears that were fueled in excitement and worry away.

"Have fun, buddy. Just not too much fun." Rod laughed patting his back as they parted. Miles climbing into the Jeep instantly starting the engine making us all make a single file line to the side of the driveway as he backed up straightening up on the street. Just the way I remembered teaching what seemed like yesterday, but in reality was two and a half years ago.

"I love you guys." He screamed as he drove away the sound of his music blaring into the early Jersey morning. We all went inside to have coffee, and talk. The whole exchange passing in a blur as I waited for the word that Miles had safely made it to his dorm. When the call came, we all rejoiced and when our separate ways. Jamia and Rod back home and Gerard and I back into the house as I wandered aimlessly unsure of what to do now. There wasn't any laundry to do, or anyone to really cook for. After all of these years Gerard and I could fuck on counters, walk around naked, and I couldn't think of a thing to do other than park myself back on my barstool and sulk.

"Frankie." Gee sang returning from a trip upstairs that had gone completely unnoticed to me as I racked my brain for anything to do. Not even song lyrics coming to me, making my subconscious wage a war on itself to produce something poetic. The sound of Frank Sinatra starting to play out of his elaborate sound system that I was too afraid to touch. "Cmon get up, sugar." He begged grabbing my hand my body feeling like dead weight as I stood in front of him.

"Its not that I'm sad he grew up, im just going to miss him. I don't really know what to do with myself not having anyone to take care of." I whispered wrapping my arms around Gerard neck laying my face on his chest.

"You'll always have me to take care of." Gerard reminded me as he wrapped his arms around my waist starting to sway his hips to the song. The cliche picture of an old married couple dancing through their kitchen settling itself on us. "I love you." He said kissing my cheek before unclasping my arms from their place spinning me out into the room.

"I love you more." I reminded giggling at his theatrics.

"I love you most." He laughed pulling me closer to him his hand grabbing mine and pulling the tangled mess to lay on his heart. His voice starting to sing along with Sinatras. "You know I think I have a think for Franks." He joked making me laugh as I tipped up on my toes to kiss him.

"Well you're stuck with me." I joked sticking my tongue out at him. Our bodies twirling through the dining room, kitchen, and living room. Until I couldn't be sad anymore and all I could think about was how I had everything I had ever wanted.