alternate feelings || bws

chapter seven || "i need bread"

"I can't see why you had to come with me." I sigh as we walk around the local Asda, him pushing the trolley which I really shouldn't trust him with considering he's rammed it into five people so far and almost knocked over a wine rack.

I was tutoring him for what seems like forever, he was very difficult to work with and got distracted very easily. He had met my very Scottish dad and I hadn't seen Brad afraid of anyone until the moment my dad walked into my room. I don't see why since you could see how fragile he was, trying to hide it and I wanted to shout at him for not having his oxygen cannula in or for even walking around the house but I know my dad doesn't want people knowing he has cancer to take pity on him; much like myself.

He acknowledged Brad with a nod before handing money over to me for the grocery shopping which I was going to do when I had taken Brad home. That wasn't what Brad had in mind and made me take him with him because he "loves Asda more than he loves his mum". He also wanted to come back to help unload the shopping and to continue with the tutoring.

"Asda is my happy place." He smiles, running with the trolley then standing on the back of it; this was a totally different person and I didn't know how to feel about it.

I walk in the opposite direction of him, aware he has all the food we need but I can totally run around and get it again. Speed walking down the opposite isle as I try and get away from the man who was acting like a three year old.

I hear him calling my name and I peak around the corner to see him running around the place with a trolley. I can't help the smile that comes to my face as I quickly walk to the next isle. I was actually having fun, guess Asda is alright after all.

"Lauren!" He shouts and my face heats up in embarrassment as all the shoppers stop to stare at him but he doesn't seem bothered whatsoever.

Instead we both have massive smiles on our faces as I continuously hide from him and he tries to find me.

I run to the end of the isle I am currently in and sneak to the one he is, using light footsteps to creep up on him and when I reach behind him I stay as quiet as possible, even going as far as stopping my breathing and wait for him to turn around.

When he does turn around he jumps and does a little scream that leaves me falling to the ground with tears rolling down my face. The scream sounded like it belonged to a little girl and it was the greatest thing I have ever heard.

"That was beautiful." I laugh as he stares down at me, also trying not to laugh.

He pulls me up and wipes the tears from my face as I slowly begin to calm down, my smile still very much there on my face. I stare at him as he stares back at me, a small, soft smile on his face as he looks over every inch of me.

"You're beautiful Lauren, do you know that?"

I didn't know what to say, I had received a genuine compliment from someone who was supposed to hate me and I was supposed to hate him. We were meant to be enemies and want the other one dead but this feels like the total opposite.

I had to remind myself that he could be putting up a front right now, trying to get something from me or trying to make me believe he's someone he isn't and then makes a fool out of me. I don't want to get hurt, not again.

"I need bread." I quickly say, backing away from him not even realising we were that close and head off to find the bread as he follows behind.

I was in for an awkward car ride and that is exactly what I had got.

I payed for the food and Brad kindly helped me pack everything up and load it into the boot of my car, all without a single word and then got into the car whilst I put the trolley away.

I honestly don't know why he isn't talking to me, I didn't do anything wrong all I did was not answer or not did what I think he expected; kiss him. First of all I don't even feel that way towards him, I don't even really know him that well and yesterday I hated him, today I punched him and now he's insinuating the fact that he wants me to kiss him? I am more than confused.

I like him more than I did three hours ago but that doesn't mean I'm going to romantically feel for him after for all I know a fake compliment.

He probably doesn't even like me (we're most likely still on the dislike scale) and it was just in the moment.

I get in the car and put the keys in the ignition, fastening my seat belt and starting the car.

"Can you take me home?" He asks and my eyes roll.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because I want to fucking go home, is that a problem?" And here we are, all the way back where we started.

It was always going to go back to this and I think this is how it's just meant to be. We hate each other, that's that.

"This is fucking ridiculous, you were fine in there but as soon as something doesn't go the way you want it you throw all your toys out the pram." I say, genuinely sick of the way he acts towards me.

"Fuck off Lauren, you think you know me but you know fuck all." He snaps. "You think you're all it, that everyone fucking likes you and you're the princess of the school. You have a perfect life and-"

"I have a perfect life do I? You don't know me either, Brad." I shout, he has no clue what happens in my life and he has no idea how hard it is and for him to stereotype me really set me off.

"Everything you fucking do is perfect! You have the ideal life. You're popular, you're pretty, you have a roof over your head and you have a family."

"So do you." I swallow, my voice becoming significantly quieter.

"Whatever you say." He sighs, resting his head against his arm that was up against the car door.

We both had no idea what each other was going through. He didn't know that we struggled to have the roof over our head and soon I would have no family left and I just didn't know him; I didn't know what he was going through.

We were both so quick to judge each other, to hate each other but maybe we weren't as different as we had originally thought.