alternate feelings || bws

chapter twelve || "hop off my dick"

My head rests on my hand which is propped up against the table in front of me as Katie, the girl I had made my mission to help and my new friend, rambled on about nothing in particular. She had text me as soon as I had left her but I didn't get a chance to see it until the next day, when Brad had left in a huff and we connected. I was pulled to her because she reminded me so much of Liv and it was clear she wasn't in a great mental state. Getting to know her she's even more like Liv and that makes me happy.

Perhaps it's a bit weird or psychotic that I only befriended someone because she reminded me of my dead best friend, that I'm trying to hold onto someone so much I actually find someone who has some similarities and quickly become obsessed with the. It was a way of coping and right now that's all I seemed to do, just cope with everything.

My eyes were beginning to close; it was first period on a Monday I think everyone in this room is tired out of there minds. Most off of partying all weekend however my reason was because I was busy playing games with someone, and worrying about my dad.

"Oh my god, Lauren!" Katie suddenly exclaims, causing me to jump and my heart rate to quicken.

"Katie, too early. Inside voice." I hush her and she sheepishly smiles at me.

"Sorry." She whispers. "But Brad Simpson is staring at you." She informs me and as I look over at the table he is occupying with his friends I find that he is in-fact staring at me.

His eyes light up as he sees me looking back at him and waves his phone about, I think signifying the fact that he wants me to check my phone so that's exactly what I don't do.

Instead I hold my phone up so he can see it and turn it off and then tilt my head with a tight smile on my face which drops after two seconds and turn my head back to Katie.

"I wish I was as cool as you." My friend sighs and I grab her hand from across the table.

"You are cool, cool as a cucumber." I instantly cringe as that sentence leaves my mouth but it causes her to laugh which makes me smile, not regretting every single life choice I have ever made.

My head begins to spin slightly, my vision un-focusing for a second and I immediately knew what was happening and unfortunately I don't have a Brad to my back and call today. Having pissed him off enough within the last forty-eight hours.

I felt bile rising to my throat and if I didn't get to a bathroom within the next two minutes I was probably going to projectile vomit over everyone.

"Lauren, are you alright? You look ill."

"Cover for me." I rush out, standing up and quickly grabbing my bag and before speed walking out the classroom.

I run down the halls to the closest bathroom and immediately when I get to the toilet vomit comes spewing out my mouth. This was getting out of hand, I no longer had this whole thing under control; I don't think I've ever had it under control.

I hear the bathroom door open as well as the stall door being pushed open as I hadn't had time to lock it. My hair was pulled out my face and a hand was placed gently on my back, rubbing it softly like I was so fragile I could break if they pressed even the tiniest bit harder. I instantly knew who it was, feeling the rings on my back and something else I would never admit.

I flushed the toilet and grabbed some toilet paper to wipe my mouth and a mint from my bag, just wanting to get the taste out of my mouth as quickly as possible. As I look up Brad was looking at me with a knowing look, an angry look and I knew he was going to yell at me before the words could even leave his lips.

"What are you doing to yourself? Are you taking something? Drugs?" He angrily asks.

I shake my head, running my hands through my curls. What I was doing was destroying me more than any drugs ever could.

"Then what the fuck is wrong with you? You look so fucking ill, Laur, you literally look like you're on deaths door." He informs me and everything he is saying is shooting right over my head.

Everyone can see something is wrong with me, I don't listen to them though. I'm fine or at least I will be fine.

"Nothing! Hop off my dick, Jesus fucking Christ." I say, frustrated with him, myself and this whole situation.

"What is up with you lately? Your more of a bitch than you usually are." He rolls his eyes.

"Who the fuck do you think you are? I've got enough going on than to have you throw insults at me twenty-four-fucking-seven." I should at him.

"Calm down, babe. I have better thing to do than annoy you and have you yelling at me; you're not that special."

In that moment we were arguing again, and then I did something. Something I wanted to do Saturday morning, something I should have done Saturday morning. I grabbed his face in both of my hands and pressed my lips against his, pulling away almost instantly.

The stuff I felt during that kiss was the shit that only happens in Nicholas Spark movies.

He stares at me for a second before pulling me onto his lap and smashing his lips upon mine and we let them move together in complete harmony.

So there we were, sitting on the floor in the bathroom stall, having just argued and now taking part in the most passionate kiss I have probably ever had, the most feelings I have ever felt during a kiss.

"Fucking hell Lauren, you really do pick the best situations to do this shit don't you." He pulls away, slightly out of breath.

"Only the best for you." I smile.

He pulls my lips back to his, his hands messing up my hair and him messing up my head.

wow im a mess, sorry for the late update again loves.

you showed me that love really did hurt.