I ONLY HAVE To Laugh

"Free at Last" Part 26

"Free at Last"

Wow, it's almost over and to think everyone said, "I would feel weird, empty, grief and go through a flood of emotions." Well, I feel nothing, no wave of emotion, no regret, now that feels weird. I received my final divorce papers on Friday, signed sealed and delivered and it states, "My partnership will be extinguished on 9/21/2017 at midnight." Wow. My boyfriend and I had just come from going out so he was there; I was actually waiting expecting to feel that flood of emotions and thinking I hope I do not have a break down while he is here. He would think something else and he is already super jealous of my ex, while I felt nothing except happiness. I was so happy jumping around my room at 1 a.m. in the morning saying, yes, yes; I will finally be a single woman. You should have seen my boyfriend's face; even he seemed surprised over my exuberant reaction. And he is saying, like yes, baby you are a single woman, kind of laughing at me as in his mind I am not single. I told him, I am single, when you file taxes, the status is single, married or widowed, there is no "in a relationship status". He agreed. I told him let me enjoy my moment.

It has been a few days, and I must say I am starting to ponder, I do have some bitter sweet memories but no longer angry. Wow, it took a long time for me to feel this way. I was given a book about divorce when all this first started, I never even opened it. I was so angry, I did not want to hear advice from anyone, I wanted to feel everything and did not want to have a biased opinion by reading a book. I think that now I am going to read it, I want to see what is someone's opinion or advice. I want to compare similarities and see if we come to the same conclusion. I know how I feel and what I went through and I can say it truly was a life experience. I have found strength in places unknown, comfort in strangers and have learned to appreciate the little things. I found my faith in God, new friends and let go of old friends. I now know what I want and truly am self-fish it's all about me. I am thankful for my family and each day I breathe. I know now, it did not matter what I did, or who I became it would not have changed anything in my marriage; it was not me who was unhappy it was him. He is still unhappy and hopefully one day he will find himself. I on the other hand, have been blessed with everything. Thank you Jesus you knew I needed happiness and the only way was for him to leave. I would have stayed forever.

I am on way to Washington D.C. for training; I actually will be in D.C. when my divorce is final. I think it is so fitting; I could not have even planned for this to happen. I will be in my nation's capital with my head held high, by myself screaming "I'm Free at Last".  I only have to laugh. 

By funnybreakup