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Chapter X: Paper Flowers

* Bella's POV *

~ 🌹~

In my field of paper flowers, and candy clouds of lullaby. I lie inside myself for hours and watch my purple sky fly over me.

I laid here in a field of red roses, watching the blue sky. It seems like I'm dreaming. Am I? I really don't know it's hard to say. I'm awake and I'm breathing.....I'm breathing. Strangely I don't know how I got here. The wind is blowing nicely, and it feels okay. I feel as if nothing could ruin this moment. All I need is for the love of my life TJ to join me.

I closed my eyes turning my head to the other side of me smelling the sweet rose petals of love. My heart is beating slowly, and normal.

Don't say I'm out of touch.

I open my eyes again and the sky suddenly turned grey. A storm had came. Thunder and lightning had started clashing with each other, and the wind was blowing harshly now. I stood up looking around, everything was disappearing, and tearing apart. Why? why is this happening? I look up a hill nearby and I see Jayy approaching me. I smiled a little, he's the only that can make me happy again.

When we were finally face to face his expression had suddenly changed. He seemed disturbed of some sort.

"TJ what's wrong?" I asked.

He suddenly started shedding tears of sadness. I didn't understand, why though. I wrapped my arms around his waist, comforting.

"Bella please forgive me......" he sobbed.

"What happened? you didn't do anything love. Please stop crying. I love you."

He held his head down. For some reason he didn't want to look at me.

" Bella  please understand that I must leave you."

"No! don't leave me you're the only one I have remember?"

He continued to look down. Something is not right I feel it in my veins.

"Paper flowers...." He whispered.

"What?" I said.

"Paper flowers...." He whispered again.

"What about them?" I asked.

"Place them on my grave...." He said.

"What are you talking about?"

"When I die..." He paused. "Place the paper flowers on my grave. I'm going to die."

"TJ please stop you're scaring me. Look at me when I'm talking to you! TJ!" I suddenly shook him.

He finally looked at me and his tears were blood, and his eyes were black. He was crying blood. I began stepping back.

"TJ....." I whispered.

"Remember me. Remember that I loved you....always." He whispered.

He suddenly vanished. I became even more afraid.

"TJ!" I screamed.

He was gone. I looked around for him, and he just vanished. The wind had gotten even stronger, and the lightning had struck a tree. The rain had started pouring down harder than ever. I looked down and saw that the roses were gone. They were no longer beautiful and red. They were paper flowers now. They're just plain, and lifeless. Paper flowers.

Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming.

~ 💀~

I was tossing and turning screaming out of my mind. I couldn't believe what I had saw. I felt a pair of hands grab me, holding me tightly. I was still screaming.

"Bella....." A deep voice said.

My eyes were still closed, and I kept screaming.

"BELLA!" the voice yelled.

I suddenly stopped screaming and finally opened my eyes. TJ  was sitting next to me, holding onto my arms. He looked worried, and afraid. I began sobbing. He took me in his arms and just held me.

"Shh it was just a bad dream. Everything is okay I promise. I'm here...I'm here."

"TJ I-I dreamed that you were gone. You left me TJ...y-you left me. You told me to place paper flowers on your grave when you died, and then you just vanished. You just vanished without even saying goodbye." I sobbed.

He pulled back and looked at me with those sad eyes of his.

" Bella you know I'd never leave you. Never. I'm here to stay remember? i'd never leave you all alone. We belong together. There's no way I'd ever leave you without saying goodbye. And I'm not going to die anytime soon. I love you."

"It was horrible! y-you were crying blood a-and.."

I couldn't finish my sentence. I was too shaken up. I couldn't function right at all. I'm a mess.

TJ held me in his arms once more. He started caressing me, rubbing his hand up and down my back. I looked up at him, and pressed my lips against his.

He sat up again holding me in his lap.

"No."

I ignored his answer and began kissing his neck.

" Bella as much as I want to make love to you, I need you to rest. You're not okay right now, and it's not healthy. It's not healthy at all. You're at vulnerable state right now, and I can't do that to you. I can't take advantage of you like that, and I won't. That's not what our love is about."

"TJ you don't understand. I'm willing to do anything....I just need to forget that horrible nightmare. You don't know how hard it is."

"And I understand that but I need you to rest, and I'm worried about you. I am. I can't let you go on like this. I don't want anything to happen to you. Bella please...I'll hold you in my arms all night and I'll never let go. I promise."

I didn't say anything. I just looked away defeated, and laid down. He came close to me and wrapped his arms around me. He held me close all night just like he said. I didn't go back to sleep, I just laid here and sobbed all night.

In my field of paper flowers.

~ 🌹 ~