My Head or My Heart?

Chapter 29

I laid there against his chest not moving.

Did he just say what I think he said?

I felt him move against me, "hello? Earth to Jaya."

"huh?" I asked looking at him still taking in what he said.

"you ok?" he watched me a little concerned.

"I'm good."

"your answer and body language are coming off the opposite."

I sighed as I ran a hand over my face, "sorry. It's just been a long day. I'm still taking in a lot of stuff."

"Like what I said?"

I fell silent again for a second, "yea. Like that..." I trailed off.

"Look like I said I know it's not ideal or anything, but...I don't regret saying it. It's been something that's been on my mind for a minute. And like I told you before at the engagement dinner, I'm from a family that shares. It wouldn't feel right to just keep it to myself."

Maybe I should tell him how I feel? my mind thought as I sighed again looking up at him. All of this is a fucking mess no matter how you look at it. Not only am I in love with two guys, who happen to be father and son, but they both have proposed to me saying how they can't be with anyone else.

I guess he took my silence as still thinking about things because he leaned forward and softly kissed me, "look. You don't have to say anything if you don't feel ready."

"no..." I placed my hands on both sides of his face, "Look Nico I...I know this wasn't how either one of us thought this would all go down. But...I'm not ready to give you an answer yet. To what you said earlier..." I saw his face change to a bit of sadness. I quickly added, "but I do love you. That much I do know."

He sadly smiled as I rubbed my hand along his jawline. "alright alright Jaya..." he said trying to pull away.

"no Nico..." I said grabbing his face and pulling it back towards me, "I love you." I said slowly locking eyes with him as I pulled him towards me and kissed him softly on the lips. His hands grabbed mine and then went down to my shoulders pulling me closer to him. This kiss was different, usually ours were hasty and lust filled but this was, slow and passionate. Each one making me want more which he was more than happy to give. We slowly began to make out exploring each other's mouths as if we had never done so before. This new experience was making me a bit light headed, I was not sure if it was a good or bad feeling but all I knew was that I did not want it to end. He pulled away and I softly sighed eyes still closed. I blinked seeing him give me a small smile.

"I love you too." he whispered back giving me another peck as he pulled my head against his chest.

We did not say anything for a minute just enjoying each other and our new declarations. When Luca and I said 'I love you'  to each other, there was a specialness to it. Yet, what just happened between Nico and I made me feel as if I had been waiting my whole life to hear those three words. It felt surreal yet so right despite having heard it so many times before.

"So..." he began the rumble of his voice vibrating my ear on his chest, "I guess this is a bad time to ask you this then."

"If it's the same thing you just asked, you already know my answer." I said not looking up.

He chuckled, "actually it's not. A few days ago Sherry came into my office and told me I won an award."

My eyebrows lowered in confusion, "wait," I said looking up at him "you won an award?"