Mistakes [Louis Tomlinson Fanfiction]

Chapter 15

"Are you going to say anything?" I asked Louis who hasn't said anything so far. After our confession minutes ago, Louis is finally going to tell me the real reason behind on why he left. in all honestly I'm scared to find tout the truth.

I'm scared because what if it was because he didn't want to be with me anymore? And that just gave him an excuse. What if he doesn't want the kids? Or what if-

"I was scared."

"Scared?"

"Yes scared." Does he not think that I was scared? And is he can read my mind.

"I know what you're thinking. Being scared was no excuse for what I did."

"It's not." I interrupted him. And not with a very pleased tone.

"I kno-

"No you don't know. Do you not think that I was scared? I was sixteen! Pregnant with twins. Not only one Louis. But two." I interrupted him once more. "While you were out in the world making something of yourself, I was stuck here at home raising your kids. Hoping and wishing that someday you will return. But that never happened. After a while I gave up hope.

"You could do so much better than me." He looks me in the eyes while saying that.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You know that you are. Everyone has told you that you were."

"Louis, that has nothing to..."

"While I was gone you could've found someone better. I didn't come back because I wanted you to find the right person. The right person that would've helped you raise Andrew and Leah." He licks his lips. "I was scared. Not only to be a father, but having you hate me for leaving. What I was scared of the most, was you actually finding someone better."

"I always had this fear that you would find someone better even way before we started dating."

"Why." Is all I can manage to say.

"Everyone always said you were too good for me. And I agreed. Didn't stop me from going after you though."

"Louis no I wasn't."

"Yes you were. C'mon Lex, you had guys from every grade going after you. Every guy on the football team would always talk about you, but stopped once Jason said you were his sister. Yet you chose me. I was selfish. I only cared about how these babies would've affect my future. So I left, not even stopping to think about how they would have affected you."

"But I chose you Louis. Out of all the people I could have chosen, I chose you. Because I liked you." I told him while putting a band on his cheek. It's true. I probably could've gotten any guy that I wanted. But Louis is who I wanted. I chose Louis because he wanted me for me. Not my looks, and star brother, but me. The weird, dorky, awkward loser from school.

"You shouldn't of have been."

"But I was Lex." He looks as if he's about to cry. But I don't know why.

I don't know what to say to him. Him not returning was not of fear of being a dad at a young age, but me actually choosing and finding someone who is better than him. Little does he know that I never dated anyone in the past 5 years. And if I did nothing serious. No matter what happens between the two of us I will still love him. After all he is the father of my kids.

"I'm afraid I already have." Louis says stating blankly ahead.

"Already have what?" I question

"Lost you."

"Louis look at me." I take his face in my hands and make him look at me directly. I look at him right in the eye while saying this.

"You've never lost me. And you never will."

**

A/N: What is this? I honestly don't know what I just wrote. All I know is that this chapter is mostly about Louis. Poor Louis though. I feel bad. I'm basically just going to be updating fillers. So basically they're all going to be filler chapters until we get to the good stuff. Trust me it'll be good stuff maybe some drama? There are errors and I am aware of them.