"BUT WHAT'S THE GOOD IN GOODBYE ANYWAY?"
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In which a heartbroken Richie Tozier receives letters from his missing best friend.
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ALOSERSWORLD
RICHIE X EDD...
"Me and you. You and me. No matter how they toss the dice, it had to be. The only one for me is you, and you for me. So happy together."
-The Turtles
(Happy Together, The Turtles)
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"Well, let's start looking for Eddie," Ben stated with a grin. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a picture of the missing boy. "We can go around and ask people if they have seen him. Isn't that a good plan?"
Richie nodded his head slowly but stopped when he saw the picture of Eddie. He grabbed it and pushed it close to his face. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned towards Ben. "Wait," he paused, his face scrunching up. "Why the hell do you just casually have a picture of Eds?"
"Yeah," Mike joined in. "Why do you have that?"
"I have pictures of all my friends," Ben defended. "And I brought it with me because I knew you losers would come unprepared, so you should be thanking me."
"I'd hate to imagine you jerking off to a picture of Mr. Hanlon," Richie bluntly replied. He lifted his hand and turned to Mike and waited for his high five. Mike glared at him for a while before slowly bringing his hand to his.
"Oh, stop it, Richie," Mike mumbled before jumping into the joke, "He would never jerk off to a picture of me, we all know he'd be jerking off to a picture of Beverly." Richie lifted his hand again and he and Mike shared another high five while chuckling.
Ben shook his head at the two. "You guys are the worst," he groaned. "I don't masturbate, I would never do that. I wouldn't jerk off to a picture of Mike and I wouldn't jerk off to a picture of Bev. That's gross."
"It is gross," Mike agreed. "But a lot of people do it. Masturbation itself isn't that bad though, it's normal. Usually, everybody tries it at least once. And if you're like Richie, you'll do it every chance you get."
Richie snorted loudly at the comment. "That's not true," he scoffed. Mike gave him a long look while laughing. "Okay, tell me, Mike, how often do you tickle your pickle?"
"Guys, can we stop talking about pickles and if we tickle them or not?" Ben asked, uncomfortable by the whole conversation that was taking place. "I think that's a personal topic and we should just keep it to ourselves-"
"I don't tickle my pickle," Mike said, shaking his head. "I've never felt the need to. I've only liked one person and he loves someone else, so my "pickle" doesn't need to be "tickled" and I don't even think about stuff like that. You, on the other hand, have been caught "tickling" yourself by all of the losers."
