50 Shades Without You

Chapter 32

Sabrina's P.O.V

I opened the door and Jack stood there. I couldn't read his expression. It was like angry and happy all at once. He sharply breathed in and said "How? Why? I-" He looked her up and down. "Um hi? Can I help you" I reply, squeezing my wrist. He reaches forward and takes my hand. The ring flashes in the light. "Don't lie to me, Ella" He said quietly. I felt my eyes widen with fear. "Let's talk. Real shit" He said more aggressivley. 

I let him in and he sits down, but automatically shoots back up. "Why?" He huffed finally. "You have to understand.. I had no one- none of you would talk to me, your career would have went up in flames if- I couldn't do it" My heart was beating rapidly. "This wasn't the solution!" He yells. "Shh you'll wake her up" I hushed him. "Who?" He said quiter. "Olivia" I said, looking down.  "Your daughter" He said nodding slowly. "Our daughter" I added. His eyes lit up. "Mine? Ours? Can- can I meet her?" He asked. "Can we finish this first" I chuckle a little. "Yeah, yeah, please" He sits down, a bit less mad. 

"How? I'm- you put me through so fucking much, and for what? To get away from deserved hate?" He says, louder than he was speaking before. "I never did any of those things.. David set it all up to break us up. But he did help me leave.." I sigh. "I knew if I stayed I'd just get more and more depressed- without you. And I wanted Olivia to be happy. So I came here, I have a job, and Alice. It isn't that bad." I stared at the ground the whole time. "I knew I couldn't say anything publicly or your whole gang thing would be exposed. Everyone pushed me out, ignored me for weeks. I couldn't-" 

He was quiet. "So no one knows- not even your family?" He finally asked. "No, no one except Alice and her family" I say. "The hair, eyes, is it permanent?" He asked, slowly understanding my point of view. "No" I shake my head and take my wig off and plop out my contacts. I look up at him for the first time and tears are running down his face as he looks at me. "Let's go wake her up" I stand up but collapse back. My legs are weak. He helps me back up and I can walk alright. I open the door to Olivia's nursery quietly. "Goodmorning" I whisper and smile as I pick her small body up. 

I had just gotten her from Alice's so she was pretty tired. She yawned and Jack cooed. "That's definitley mine" He smiled. My heart skipped a beat at his smile. He looked up from her to me. "You look so beautiful, you both do" Jack said. "I'm sorry" I whisper. "I am too" He says. It was quiet and how it should be. Jack, Olivia, and I. "What happens now?" I ask. "Well, you can't just come back as Ella. People would lose their shit." He said. I have no clue what to do. "I could come back as Sabrina? Or you could come here?" I say, rocking Olivia. 

"I can't just leave everything" Jack shakes his head. "People might know.. I don't know" I shrug. I laid the baby back down and looked at Jack. He pulled my waist in and kissed me. I missed his kiss so much. "So, whatcha been up to" He says when we pull away. 

We spend the rest of the day together watching movies and talking. Jack, Olivia, and I. Like I knew it could be. I missed him holding me. I didn't even have to pretend to be anyone else with him. I never had. He even called Claire and cancelled, which lead to a break up. I had hope for once in the past year that I'd be happy again. And right now, I was. "Jack, really, what happens?" I sighed. "We haven't heard anything that works for both of us.. maybe there isn't" He says.

"So we'll agree on one of them, I go there, you come here, we both flee, we-" I spit out anxiously. "Ella, maybe there is no way" He raises an eyebrow. "We might just.. just have to leave it at this. I can visit.. we can facetime" He tells me. I look at him like he's crazy. "I've been away from you for a year, Jack. The worst year of my life. I can't just not be with you again. We have a daughter.." I say. "I know- I know." He bites his lip as he thinks. "But I have a career and I love you- I love Olivia, but what about my life?" Jack asks and rubs his forehead. 

"What about your life? What about me?" I start to get more frusterated. "What about me thinking you were dead for a year!" He yells. "I'm sorry, Jack!" I yell back. "You left me! And you were nothing but selfish. I still love you, I always will. But you fucked me up, Ella" He says. "I think you should go" I huff as Olivia starts crying. I pick her up from her rocker and Jack's face gets softer. "Bye Olivia" He says and steps forward. I flinch. I don't bother to look up at him. He kisses Olivia's forehead and then mine. "Bye Ell" He mumbles and leaves.

Just like that. He's out of my life again. But the seceret is out. And I miss my friends. I first tell David everything. He says I should do whatever feels right. So I type in Nate's number and facetime him. It rings for awhile before Alex's little face pops up. "It's Ella! HI Ella!" He yells. I hear Nate say "No, no Alex. Let me see my ph- Ella!" 

"Hi" I smile a little. "You're alive!" He screams. Tasha,  holding a small Natalia runs over, tears already ready to spill over. So, I explained everything to them, then to Sammy, then to literally everyone else. I called my aunt, she didn't belive it at first. I warned each of them no one else could know. Ecspecially not social media. In fact, I'd be back soon. I had a plan brewing and David would help. Ella Emiston was back. 

(( HOW YALL DOIIIINNNNN, IM TRYING TO DECIDE ONCE THIS BOOK FINISHES IF I SHOULD WRITE A 50SOG 3))))