Just My Cup of Tea

twenty

'Slow down! At this rate, anyone would think you're running away from something!' I hollered over the masses of leaves and twigs and branches at my oh so lovely husband, who has faithfully ditched me for quite possibly the 12th time. 

'I thought you exercised.' He turned around and stood several meters ahead of me in his usual glory, looking perfectly content, a single eyebrow raised as he studied me, not a single drop of sweat on his flawless skin and not a tinge of rouge on his unsmiling cheeks. While I, on the other hand, stood with one hand on my hip and the other gripping a poor branch for dear life as I huffed and puffed for breath, completely drenched in my sweat and bright red from the heat. His breathing didn't even deepen! 

'I do! But I don't do whatever intensive torture routine you seem to do!' I glowered back, clambering a few paces towards him.

'You're so unfit.' he looked bored at this point, as he shifted his weight to the other foot and watched me. 

'I do marathons for your information!' I argued, climbing towards him again. 

'What good is a marathon when you can't even climb a mountain?' he genuinely looked like he wanted to know.

'Yeah, because normal people plan on how they're going to climb mountains one day.' I smirked slightly at him. 

'If a zombie apocalypse happens, you won't be running marathons you'll be climbing mountains.' he stated in a matter-of-fact voice making me burst out laughing.

'You've clearly spent loads of time thinking this through. No, you wouldn't, not if you're gonna stay near the ground.' 

'That would get you killed instantly since masses live closer to the ground.'

'That's why your marathon running would come in handy. You could outrun them. Now give me a hand.' I reached a single hand out to him to help pull me over the ledge. He looked at my hand for a single moment, then at my face, before turning around and walking off without a single word. 

Rude!

I mumbled some very colourful and very creative curse words that would make a sailor blush and oh so gracefully pulled myself up, almost tripping over my own foot and probably falling to my death in which my skull would probably get cracked open in the process. Maybe then he'd have felt bad for not helping me up. Unless that was his plan all along. 

However, much to his misfortune, I didn't trip over my own foot and would live yet another day as I sluggishly hurried behind him. Alexander woke me up with some kind of torturous trumpet at 4 in the bloody morning leaving me to conclude that there was definitely something wrong with his brain because nobody in their right mind would wake up at that ungodly hour yet alone do something as unforgiving and sinful as wake someone else up with a stupid horn unless they were indeed very much insane. 

After demanding that I get dressed because we were going hiking and leaving my room in his stupid glory, I, of course, being the reasonable person I am, chose to ignore him and go to sleep only to be woken up by a bucket of water being splashed all over me. The next 5 minutes consisted of me chasing him around the house and threatening to rip out his intestines but it was early and I was tired and I gave in soon and because my bed was drenched and I was too emotional to go to bed and the idea of hiking to the highest point and seeing a sunrise was very very appealing, I accepted my defeat gracefully and in the next 20 minutes, we were hiking through the dark, battling the heat and the mosquitos and the drowsy eyes. 

'How much longer?' I asked again, beginning to notice a few strands of light in the sky. 

'Not long.' was the short and curt reply I got back. But by this time, I could see the sky slowly turning into a duller black and small wisps of the beginnings of a sunrise and I had been hiking for a good 1.5 hours and I was going to make sure I made the most of it and saw the sunrise.