reveal secrets. | langst/klangst [DISCONTINUED]

dancing nights

//an: well, a chapter or two today? Would you guys enjoy that? I've been working my ass off for the next few chapters, but you'll have to found out what's next tomorrow..! :) I hope you enjoy! ;)//

Lance

After a while, Keith had finally calmed down. I knew why he had broke down like that. This meant a lot for him. He doesn't know where in the hell his dad is, 'nor his mom. That was all honestly, unfair but we have to deal with it.

He stands up and looks at me. I stay at my position, raising an eyebrow at him. I can see the emotions swirling through his eyes. He's vulnerable and I didn't tease him one bit about it.

He's confused, he's confused of what I'm doing. I would confuse me.

I just shrug and tell him to wash his face. I needed my sleep...or maybe not, we can hold off from that. That thought sent shivers down my spine. I shake it off and just change. For the second time, I was stopped. Oh my god—

"Lance, I'm gonna go. They need me back in BoM." He says with slight hurry in his voice. Clearly this was urgent.

"Sure, Be safe." I say as I nod towards him. Genuinely meaning for him to be safe. I finally get to change but after all that, I just want to sleep an rest. I just wanna be alone and be myself. I just want to be me.

I changed my clothes and layed down. Not bothering trying to get some sleep. Most nights I don't—I can't—get sleep. Most nights my brain is just clouded with thoughts. Most nights, I wish I wasn't so alone but I guess, subconsiously, I wanted it.

Useless.

I'm not! I've been doing as much work!

Hah! Right! You are useless and everyone thinks so. You have failed in majority of missions in some way, haven't you?

Y-you're right. I can't do anything right.

I start to feel the steaming hot tears that roll down my face, I don't bother trying to stop it. I don't bother stopping myself. I cried and cried and cried. Told myself I didn't need to be on the team.

Useless. Pathetic. Worthless. Seventh WHEEL. Replacement. Worst pilot ever. STUPID.

After sobbing for a while, I found myself running to the bathroom. All the tears gone. My eyes clouded as I stare at the mirror. I got the knife that Keith gave me, placed it near my wrist.

Useless. Cut.
Pathetic. Cut.
Worthless. Cut.
SEVENTH WHEEL. Two cuts.
Replacement. Cut.
Worst pilot ever. Cut.
STUPID. Three cuts.

I stopped as I gained control once again and washed the blood off my arm. I washed the blood of the blade and put bandages on my arms. Hid my art with my sleeves. The world doesn't need to know the beauty of, only I have to.

I washed my face next and put concealer on. I walk out of the bathroom, walked out of my room, and explored the castle. I found myself in front of my sister's room. I knocked and noticed that she wasn't alone.

I smile at the sight and leave to swarm around the castle a bit more. During this I walk to Hunk's room to see him asleep, very soundly might I add. I really don't think that's healthy. He might get a heart condition, not good.

I walk to Pidge's room and see them asleep with their laptop on. I made sure to set it asside without touching any of their process. I tucked them in and leave the room with a small smile.

'Goodnight, gremlin.'

I walk up to Coran's room and see him sleeping on his desk. Even though I was in pain, I caried him to his bed and tucked him in. Closing the lights and his notebook on my way out.

'Coran, sleep well, father.'

'Shiro, please take of my sister.'

I walk around the halls of the castle and found that I was at the entrance where we had that ball. I think I'd love to get lost in music for now. As I played music from the space phone we had. I had asked Pidge to download all these for me.

[AN: The song above is what he's dancing to. While that's playing, take a break from reading and just listen.]

I danced and danced until I my body anymore. I stopped dancing and decided to walked back to my room. Taking a shower as soon as I got there and getting ready for "bed". I think I'll just listen to music instead of sleeping.

Maybe a nap later might work.