She's got some social anxiety issues, but Carlie can be really outgoing when she's around people she trusts. The thought of meeting a whole group of people she knows nothing about scares the crap out of her.. but her childhood best friend Gabbie ins...
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@car_chase: reunited and it feels so good // tagged: @gabbiehanna
I've been back in LA for a few days now. It's December 23rd and I've never felt so distant from Christmas as I have this year.
They say that you really feel loss at the holidays, and that's oh-so true. I haven't really left the house except for work, and Gabbie was letting me grieve and have my space, but I could tell she was worried about me.
There was suppose to be a big party tomorrow on Christmas Eve and everyone from the vlog squad was going. I hadn't decided if I wanted to go yet, or fly see Jess. I had started apartment hunting for us but I hadn't found a 3 bedroom that we all like yet.
I was sitting on the couch, watching my favorite Christmas movie, Jack Frost, when someone knocks on the apartment door. I furrow my eyebrows, pausing the movie, and get up to answer the door to find Heath. "Heath," I said, not expecting him.
"Hey, Carlie," He said. "Can I come in?"
"Uh, Yeah," I said opening the door and gesturing for him to come in. "What's up?"
He sits on the couch and I take a seat next to him. "Well, I wanted to tell you how sorry I am about your dad." He says.
"That's really sweet, Heath," I said, smiling.
"And I'm really sorry I haven't been there for you."
I shake my head, immediately. "Heath, it's fine."
"It's not. But I'm here now. So, if you want to talk, I'm here. Ready to listen." He said.
"Honestly, the last thing I want to do is talk about it right now.." I said, pausing to take a deep breath. "But I do need to talk to you."
"Did you think about what I said that night?" He asked.
"I did, and you're right. No bullcrap. I need to tell you how I feel." I say, and he nods, urging me to go on. "I do like you, Heath. You're hilarious, we have a good connection. You're handsome."
"Why do I feel like there's a 'but' coming in this sentence?" He asked, looking sad.
"Well.. all of that I said is true. But something else that's true, is that I like David. I like him a lot." I said.
"Oh," He said. "I guess I should have seen that coming."
"I'm really sorry, but I can't help it. I know it's awful because he's with Liza. But I have feelings for him. And I would feel horrible being with you, knowing that." I said.
He nodded, and he looked down for a moment before he looked up at me and smiled. "I can't lie, that hurts to hear. But I respect honesty. I'm glad you can be honest with me." He said.
"Me too. I really don't want to lose you." I said.
"You won't. Just give me some time to restore my pride." He said, smirking.
