adopted by josh dun | j.w.d

30

so amy exposed me today.

and josh was wrong about the clique. most of them hated me. i sat next to him on the couch sobbing my heart out. tyler was here too, with jenna who was stressed. "maybe it will only be for a week!" tyler was trying to fix this. more hate comments spammed in. "i-i'm gonna go upstairs" i mumbled, taking my phone and leaving. "mariah!" i didn't reply. i ran to my room and cried.

i started getting calls too! my number was out! i got all these texts

your so ugly

josh just feels sorry for you

you don't deserve him as a dad

change your number! it's out!

where do you live?

can we fuck?

i started crying more. josh knocked on the door, wanting to be let in. i didn't. i sat in the middle of the room sobbing. "mariah please. your not in trouble" he begged. i didn't reply. i took all the papers out of my desk and threw them to the floor, reading them over and over again.

i rocked back and forth, tears streaming down my cheeks. i was fucking hyperventilated. josh got the door open and sat next to me and held me close. "we'll fix this okay? it's going to be okay" he said. i shook my head, bawling my eyes out.

the room started spinning. my heart was pounding. what's going on? i started panicking inside. what's even happening!? i started shaking, fearing that i was losing control. i could barely even breath! i started feeling sick. "mariah everything's going to be okay" josh says, holding me. am i dreaming? am i dying!? what the hells happening!? "a-a-am i going c-crazy?" i whisper, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"this won't last forever okay? come on" he held my hands tightly. i felt my chest tingle. "count to ten with me. it's okay" he told me. i listened to his voice counting with him as my vision was back to normal and reality was with me. "fucking panic attack" i hissed, as i let go of josh's hand and wiped my eyes.

"you did good okay? you've, had a long day. rest okay?"